Friday, May 1, 2020

Beltane during stay-at-home

Happy Beltane! 

When we gather in person for Beltane, we often weave ribbons around a May Pole as we weave intentions into our lives, and bless each other's creativity and pay specific attention to what we're experiencing with our senses, this sensuous time of year. 




Some queries for reflection this stay-at-home Beltane:
  • What are you weaving into your life? 
  • What are you doing here, now, today, that nurtures your senses?  


 [photo by Mike Goren (hi, Mike!), from Bryn Mawr College May Day 2005.  A stone building framed by trees in the background, with three white May Poles on green grass; to the left, the farthest has light blue ribbons, the middle one green ribbons, and the nearest, to the right, has red ribbons (you can see ribbons from the dark blue one to the right, but not the May Pole itself.)  There are many smiling people, mostly women, mostly but not all wearing white and many wearing matching sashes, holding ribbons to the May Poles and dancing around them, as well as spectators watching.]

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Maypoles.jpg
Album here: https://www.flickr.com/photos/celebdu/albums/306062

Saturday, April 11, 2020

Pandemic post: Pesach and moving from "eternal now" back to being anchored in the cycle of the seasons

So... at the end of week four of stay-at-home for our family (end of week three for the UK), six weeks after the first covid-19 case in Scotland, part-way through Passover... here's my first pandemic-related post. 

(My Beloved Partner, inspired by Ada Palmer's #SomethingBeautiful hashtag on Twitter, has been blogging about being Present in Challenging Times for 23 days now: https://walkingaftermidnight848100467.wordpress.com/.  There are some lovely and kind of eerie pictures of life in Edinburgh there.)    

Anyway.  On to me.  

Tonight we attended a Seder via Zoom, hosted by a long-time dear friend of mine, with whom I share some other long-time dear friends.  It was a marvelously multi-time zone event, filled with people I know and people I'd never met, in person or on-line, before -- family and friends of the host, spread from northern CA, to the next neighbourhood over from our old one in Seattle, to Twin Cities, to London, to us here in Edinburgh.  

It was kind of a last-minute decision.  I had thought I was fine with pretty much skipping Pesach this year for lack of spoons.  But then I realized I wasn't, and when I posted to Facebook about some of the things I was doing to observe Passover after all, my friend invited us to their Seder. 

So Beloved Partner and I spent the afternoon putting together a Seder plate with what we have on hand.  This was a little hilarious but mostly worked really well, and it was kind of fun and creative.  

So, we had a lovely, brief-ish Seder, and then a special dinner ourselves.  

I needed this.

I realized, as we were cleaning up, pausing to look out the dining room window to the growing green in the back garden: 

**

Most of my experience so far of stay-at-home has been sort of an "eternal now" -- for example, yes, I know it's spring, because there have been several days warm enough for me to sit outside and read or crochet, and I had a birthday, and we sprang forward, and the sunrise is much earlier and the sunset even more muchly later...

But it wasn't until the Seder tonight that I felt anchored in the past and future, in the *cycle* of the seasons.

I needed that.

And I'll have to have a think about how to do that with Beltane.

** 

I feel like I ought to close with something pithy, or wise, or encouraging, or...

All I can say is what my therapist and I have been telling each other each week so far:  This shit is hard.  

I have a whole 'nother post about the Angel of Death that is still percolating, but for now my wish for us all is survival.  

Love and blessings,
Staśa

 


[top picture:
an oval wooden table, with two places set with white dishes on the long side to the left, and along the edge clockwise from there: on the far short side of the table, two white square bowls with greens (parsley, and dandelion greens for maror / horseradish), and a flower-shaped bowl with charoset; on the other long side, a blue and white Palestinian-patterned bowl with matzoh buttercrunch, salt and pepper grinders, and a pitcher of home-made pomegranate soda; on the short side, two glasses. in the middle from in front of the plates: a Seder plate with parsley, a ramekin salt water, egg, radish for beet for shankbone, dandelion greens for maror / horseradish, and a ramekin with charoset; a plate of matzoh; two glasses; a small square bowl of radish slices; silver candlesticks, one with a purple candle and one with a blue; a ramekin with another egg; and the haggadah where the computer will go.]


[middle picture: close-up of a blue-patterned Palestinian pottery bowl with broken-up pieces of matzoh buttercrunch in it]

[bottom picture: close-up on the wooden table of the silver candlesticks, now lit, purple candle on the left and blue on the right, in front of a blue-patterned Palestinian pottery bowl with matzoh buttercrunch in it.]

Saturday, February 1, 2020

Blessed Brigid

Today is Brigid, the day on the Wheel of the Year half-way between Winter Solstice, the longest night and shortest day, and Spring Equinox, when night and day are nearly equal.

Brigid is the triple Goddess of smithcraft, healing, and poetry. Many years, right about now, I feel Her in my life woven/weaving through my creativity.

This year... This year, may I know Her in Her aspects as Smith and Healer. Worker of Justice.

And yes, also, Poet. May I be reminded, again, in my body, in my being, that creativity in the face of injustice is resistance, and necessary.

So mote it be. Blessed be.

Wednesday, February 13, 2019

"Handwork as Spiritual Practice: Ministry, Magic and Prayer" at 2019 FGC Gathering


I am so excited to announce that Katherine Spinner and I are co-leading a week-long workshop on handwork and spirituality this summer at Friends General Conference Gathering (annual Gathering of North American Quakers).

This has been years in the coming for both of us, and I am SO PLEASED we finally get to do this and that I get to work with Katherine this way.

Check it out!

https://www.fgcquaker.org/connect/gathering/workshops/handwork-spiritual-practice-ministry-magic-and-prayer

[image description:

top picture: a pair of pale hands against a dark gray sweater, with a silver ring on the right hand showing moon phases, and two white gold rings on the left hand, one a plain band and the other a sapphire solitaire, holding a turquoise-blue crochet hook which is hooked through a turquoise stripe of a turquoise and purple striped work in progress.

bottom picture: a knitted half-circle shawl in reds, oranges, yellows, and blues, with a swirly/spirally edge, against a dark red background with some flowers]

Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Victim-blaming and "Fear drives hate"

I loathe the phrase "Fear drives hate."

Fear is a normal human emotion. There is nothing wrong with being afraid.

Fear is a completely appropriate response to oppression and to danger. And since most oppressed people spend an awful lot of our lives afraid, and coping with danger from the dominant majority and society, "Fear leads to hate" sounds, and has always sounded, victim-blaming to me.

Telling people basically to suppress their feelings, or that their feelings are "wrong," does not help. I'd say, based on my personal and professional experience over the decades, that stifling feelings is a *lot* more likely to result in people acting into them without thinking about it.

What's more, telling people to stifle their fear sounds a lot like grooming to me. Yes, grooming, as in for abuse. "Don't listen to yourself; you'll just hate people" teaches people not to trust themselves and to ignore danger, and that makes abuse and oppression easier for those in positions of power-over. Saying "Fear leads to hate" in an era when we're supposedly teaching children, and adults who are targets, to listen to their discomfort for the cues it gives us about power-over, is *gaslighting* -- and that is in and of itself a form of oppression and abuse.

Damned right, I'm afraid. I have lived with the experience of violence, and the threat of violence, targeted at me for who I am, my entire fucking life. That violence is part of the edge-of-awareness, subconscious, calculations I make every time I answer the door or leave the house. I have lived with the effects of that violence my entire fucking life; I live with them every day. I am alive right now, and in the current political climate, damned right, I'm afraid, for myself, and for my siblings.

And yeah, that fear leads to anger.

But there's nothing wrong with anger, either. Anger is a normal human emotion. It's a signal.

Anger is a completely appropriate response to oppression and injustice. And yeah, oppressed people can spend an awful lot of our lives angry, coping with injustice from the dominant majority and in society -- so again, "Fear leads to hate" sounds, and has always sounded, victim-blaming to me.

And damned right I'm angry.

Anger can be born of love. I wouldn't be angry if I didn't love justice. If I didn't love my siblings. If I didn't perceive and love That-Which-Is-Sacred in other people and in this Earth.

Also, I can hate what other people do and still love That-Which-Is-Sacred in them. I can still recognize their humanity and their sacredness. *That* is what helps us retain our commitment to non-violence. Our experience -- and the research -- are really clear on this.

It's dehumanization, not fear, that leads to violence.

Fear, anger, and love are fuel for the fight for justice.

And without justice, there can be no peace.

Sunday, January 7, 2018

Winter Solstice and A Winter Solstice Singing Ritual on The VUU!

On Winter Solstice -- at the moment of the Solstice, too! -- I had the pleasure and privilege of spending an hour in the on-line living room of the Unitarian Universalist Church of the Larger Fellowship, as a guest on The VUU. It was a lovely experience -- gift after gift during that hour.

Many thanks to everyone involved for our lovely conversation and experiential celebration of the Solstice, and especially to Lori Stone Sirtosky and Rina Jurceka, for much more than I can put into words in this space.

And just a reminder -- you don't have to have a group to do A Winter Solstice Singing Ritual.  You can do it by yourself in your living room, or with a small group of friends, or with 20 people in a friend's living room.   

Blessed Solstice and Happy 2018!

----------------

Watch the video on YouTube:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9iuGDm9Yr-c

Watch the video here:




Listen to the podcast/audio:

Download podcast here:

More on A Winter Solstice Singing Ritual:

A Winter Solstice Singing Ritual on Facebook:

Erica Baron's wonderful Yule story, which she read on the program:


Thursday, December 21, 2017

"Deep in the dark..."

Deep in the dark of the longest night
We keep our vigil by candlelight
Waiting to sing to the newborn Sun
The Goddess will birth when the night is done
Raise your voices, sing on high!
Let all the Earth hear your joyful cry!
On this night we sing to Light
And the Goddess of all pleasure and delight
Raise your voices, sing your praise!
O'er all the Earth til the Darkness fades
On this night we sing to Light
And the Goddess of all pleasure and delight!

- (c) Anna Ophidia Alekner, "Winter Solstice Chant"

Blessed Winter Solstice!

Saturday, October 21, 2017

New shawl design


 I have been making this crocheted blanket:

http://www.feltedbutton.com/2014/03/spring-into-summer-with-free-crochet.html

...a lot for baby blankets over the last... (checks Ravelry) year and some.


I've also been modifying it for scarves, a rectangular blanket, and, most recently, a shawl.

For the shawl, it was a mash-up of this pattern with another pattern I'd developed myself, which creates a shawl in an equal-armed L, or right-angled V. 

The original shawl's dimensions are essentially five blocks of X" square each, so that it's three squares in each direction.  I tend to use 18" squares. 

I started in the corner, as for the blanket -- (1) on the diagram below. 

I continued until I'd reached the point where the sides of the triangle were each twice 18" (18" being my square size / basic unit of measure for this shawl) -- (2) on the diagram below.  


Then I determined where the half-way point of the long edge, or working edge, was, and put a stitch marker there.

I continued from where I was, stopping when I reached the stitch marker -- turning and decreasing on the "inside," and turning and increasing on the "outside."

When the "outside" / increase edge got to 3 x 18", I started decreasing on both sides.

Then I went back to the other arm, and did the same thing there. (No seams necessary!)

It was a lot of fun to make, and I'm looking forward to experimenting with this some more.  If you try this modification, I hope you have fun and like the resulting shawl!  Enjoy. 

Julie Passanante Elman’s Tips for Supporting Shy/Introverted Students

(c) Julie Passanante Elman; re-printed with permission. 

I have done a few things with success. On the first day of class, I talk about shyness and other communication differences in my discussion of accessibility. I talk about how gender, race, sexuality, age, etc. affect our capacities and confidence in entering a conversation, and then we talk about how discussion classes often favor chatty folks or assertive communicators smile emoticon. Then, I ask them to come meet with me in private, if they're introverted or have other access needs, and we talk about it. I suggest things that I've done in the past, but I tell them that the first thing is to figure out what is most intimidating about speaking in class (i.e. bad former experiences, fear of being called on unpredictably, fear that creeps in when your hand is raised for too long, or fear of being inarticulate, etc.). Then we tailor a solution (my class always includes nonverbal forms of participation too), and here are a few examples:

1) I will only call on you if you raise your hand.

2) Email me a question ahead of time. I'll ask it, and call on you. No one will know, and you'll have your response prepared so you can speak from notes.

3) I'll call on you immediately if your hand is raised, so you won't lose your nerve.

I tell them to observe my teaching style and build trust. I don't let people dangle smile emoticon. I can spin each comment into something useful. So, if it's a matter of trusting that a prof treats comments respectfully because you've had a negative experience, that trust can only be built with time. So I tell them we can meet in a month and reassess. I tell them that oral participation is important so that other students can gain access to their valuable thoughts. I give them the option of not speaking for the semester, because I give participation credit for visiting office hours, talking to me after class, and active listening, but I try to establish that their comments are vital to collective learning. I spent a lot of time neglecting introverts in my classroom because I misunderstood their lack of participation as a lack of care about the class. That was a shortcoming as a teacher that I've really worked on over the years. In my experience, many shy students don't take an accommodation, but they end up talking anyway, because all they needed was for someone to validate their intelligence and understand that it was more difficult for them than more extroverted students. Hope this helps!

Most importantly (and I didn't say this in the original post), I try to make it clear that the goal is NOT for them to work harder to be more like extroverts. In many ways, that is precisely the cure/rehabilitation model that I try to push against in my pedagogy (i.e. the problematic cultural idea that shyness or introversion is pathological or less valuable than extroversion). Rather, it's to strive for an accessible classroom and pedagogy that encourages students to claim their education (as Adrienne Rich would say!) by figuring out, with me, what they need to grow and flourish.
 :) 

Sunday, July 30, 2017

NPYM Minute Welcoming Transgender and Gender Nonconforming People

NPYM Minute Welcoming Transgender and Gender Nonconforming People

North Pacific Yearly Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends, an organization of unprogrammed Quaker meetings and worship groups in Washington, Oregon, Idaho, and Montana, seeks to be an open and affirming faith community. We welcome all to share in worship and the activities of our common life.

North Pacific Yearly Meeting understands that the Divine Source is leading our Meeting to honor the gender identity and expression of each person, as understood by that person. We affirm that gender expression and identity may be fluid and changeable. We recognize that when we embrace the Light within the full spectrum of gender identities in our Meeting, our worship deepens and our community is enriched.

As part of our evolving struggle to live our testimony of equality, North Pacific Yearly Meeting minutes our commitment to becoming an affirming, safe, and nurturing place for everyone to live fully that which the Spirit is leading them to be.

We extend our loving care to people of all genders, including, but not limited to, transgender, genderqueer, cisgender, gender fluid, agender, gender non-conforming and intersex persons, their families and friends. We will continue to educate ourselves and our communities and take appropriate action to bring about a more equal world.

29 July, 2017

---------------

I've copied and pasted this from someone who was present.  As soon as I have a link to an official announcement, I'll post it.  - sm

Monday, June 26, 2017

Making Ripples at FGC Gathering!

Photo from Flickr user gettheshot75

Hello, folks!

I wanted to let you know that I'm helping with the group creation of what looks to be a fabulous, experiential plenary at FGC Gathering this year, "Making Ripples," under the fabulous creative direction of Vonn New.

Currently I'm up to my eyebrows in collaborative labyrinth design.  *happy creative hum*

If you're in reach of Niagara University in NY state on Wednesday, 5 July, from 7:00-8:45 pm, you are invited!

Making Ripples:

Come listen, play, sing, move, dance, and make a joyful noise as we lift up the creative spirit of Friends young and old to perform an original spontaeous composition that reminds us that beauty, joy, peace, and love are the true antidotes to our turbulent times. Join us as we move into an evening of collaborative improvisation for all ages led by Vonn New and her team and, as we're led, by all of us!


https://www.fgcquaker.org/events/making-ripples

 Call for volunteers:

Call for Volunteer Helpers & Collaborators

Contact: Vonn New, select "Making Ripples Wednesday Plenary" on the Gathering Contact Form.

Making Ripples, the program for the Wednesday evening plenary is a fully participatory evening of music, dance, reflection and community.  As Friends, we did away with the laity to lift up the ministry of all, during this program, we will eliminate the audience.

Folks who are into visual art, labyrinths, musical improvisation, herding cats, eldering, singing, dancing, helping make experiences accessible to all, and generally being helpful are all needed to pull this off. Please contact Vonn New if you want to help. (Select "Making Ripples Wednesday Plenary" on the Gathering Contact Form.)

Bellwethers - lead by example, assist in directing participants, deploying instruments and props during the event and attend a practice session beforehand, engage in fun artsy exercises in the weeks leading up to Gathering.

Manager - help coordinate the other teams, assist with problem-solving before, during, and after the event, stomp out procrastination.

Accessibility Team - advise me on how to best make the event accessible to everyone, help make that happen.

Set Up/Tear Down Team - set up chairs, props, and more before and after the event

Instrumental Musicians - participate in musical improvisation during the event and attend a practice session beforehand

Singers - participate in improvisation during the event and attend a practice session beforehand.

Dancers & Creative Movement Team - perform improvised dance as led, assist in creating and leading participant movement, attend a practice session beforehand

Visual Artists - assist in making performance space beautiful, help create beautiful instruction cards, assist in hosting participatory public art to make cards and props beforehand, help with costuming and other aesthetic ideas

Textile Artists - assist in making performance space beautiful, help create dance props, costuming ideas

Elders - provide spiritual grounding during the event, hold our preparations in the Light, provide accompaniment to this ministry
https://www.fgcquaker.org/connect/gathering/programs-and-events/evening-programs/making-ripples-volunteering

The contact form is here:
https://www.fgcquaker.org/connect/gathering/gatheringcontact

--------------

p.s  How could I leave these bits out???

Come join our Facebook group!
https://www.facebook.com/groups/644929179037375/

See the master plan here, with everything there is to know so far about what will happen Wednesday night:
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1RkkdqZdCywjiGKlut1q1LjICSXzX9mzYnSsralHDLF4/edit

Thursday, November 10, 2016

For Veterans' Day and Remembrance Sunday


It’s 3:45 am when my pager wakes me. I speak to a man who is quite upset: his sister has just died – at the end of a long illness, but unexpectedly soon – and his sister’s son is on active duty in the military, stationed overseas...

Read more:
http://aquakerwitch.blogspot.co.uk/2009/05/peace-testimony-and-armed-forces.html

(c) 2009 Nankai; used with permission

 (White poppies are worn in the UK to remember all who have died in armed conflict, not limited to soldiers and military service members.  For more information, see http://www.ppu.org.uk/whitepoppy/index.html.)

Sunday, October 30, 2016

Queries for Samhain

A blessed Samhain and New Year to you. 

Who are the ancestors you're honoring, physical and spiritual?
Who are the dead you are remembering?
What losses and endings are you marking?

Who are the new babies you are welcoming?
What people and new beginnings have been born in your life this year?


a spiral of candles in the dark
(c) Laura Treadway photography.  Used with permission.  http://lauratreadway.com/



Wednesday, April 6, 2016

Announcing "Godless Paganism: Voices of Non-Theistic Pagans"

I am excited to announce the release of the anthology "Godless Paganism: Voices of Non-Theistic Pagans," edited by John Halstead!

I have two pieces in this book, "The Theist/Non-Theist Continuum" and "Thanking the Goddess for Tea."  So do lots of other fabulous authors!

Available in paperback and e-book at
http://www.lulu.com/spotlight/johnhalstead

More information at
http://humanisticpaganism.com/2016/04/02/godless-paganism-voices-of-non-theistic-pagans-is-available-for-sale/

Enjoy!!



Monday, February 29, 2016

Quaker Spaces and Accessibility: Part 2 of 2


Part 1 is available here:  http://aquakerwitch.blogspot.co.uk/2016/02/quaker-spaces-and-accessibility-part-1.html

Thinking beyond ramps, elevators, and hearing loops: some common access tools for people with “hidden” disabilities

This is a practical exploration of some common access tools and accommodations for people with “hidden” disabilities.  This list is not exhaustive, and it should also not be used an excuse not to talk with people about their access needs; it should be used as a starting place for thought, worship, and conversation.  I strongly recommend reading part 1 first

Transportation

·      Is there public transportation to the Meeting?  To the locations of committee meetings?  Is the public transit schedule such that someone can actually use it to get to and from Meeting events?  How far a walk are the most usable public transit stops? 

·      Is information about parking and public transit clearly available on the website and in printed materials?  Is parking available nearby?  How far a walk is it?

·      Does the Meeting subsidize transportation costs for people with disabilities (and other people in the Meeting) who may need it? 

Lighting

·      Is the Meeting community in touch with the kinds of lighting that do and don’t work for Friends with disabilities?  Are different forms of lighting available? 

·      Lighting needs to be bright enough for most people to see but without producing too much glare.  If your meeting space has windows, it’s often tempting to turn out the lights and rely on natural light alone.  For some people, that light will not be enough for them to see sufficiently; for others, the contrast and glare can trigger neurological symptoms.  Check first. 

·      Presentations: Rather than automatically turning out the lights during presentations to highlight the projector screen, ask what kind of lighting works best for the people present.  Being in a mostly-dark room with some bright light can trigger neurological symptoms for some people.  Keeping all the lights on can make it difficult for people with low vision or other vision difficulties to see the screen.  Having the lights on away from the screen, and off near the screen, works well for many people.  As always, checking with the people in the room is the best way to make sure their needs are met.  Ensure the people with the loudest voices are not the only people whose needs are respected.

·      Fluorescent lighting is a known trigger for a host of issues, including but not limited to seizures, migraines, headaches, and skin problems.  Some people tolerate fluorescent lighting better than others.  If people in your Meeting have difficulties, arrange for alternative lighting, such as halogen lamps, incandescent lamps, or LEDs.  If you are using fluorescent bulbs in regular fixtures, this can be as simple as changing the bulbs to another type.  If your building has overhead tube lighting, alternatives can be as simple as bringing in table or floor lamps, and not using the fluorescent overhead lighting.   

Bathrooms

·      Are bathrooms well-signed?  Can someone unfamiliar with the building find the bathroom quickly if they leave the Meeting room, social hall, or Business Meeting in a hurry? 

·      Are Friends easily able to leave the room to use the bathroom, take medication, or eat a snack, and easily able to return?  Are they discouraged from leaving or re-entering?  If you have doorkeepers, how do they handle this?  Do Friends frown when people get up, leave, and come back during worship, business meetings, or committee meetings?  What are the unspoken – or spoken – conventions around leaving and coming back? 

·      Does your Meeting have one or more all-gender bathrooms, and space where people can change clothes, which are ADA-compliant?  Do transgender and genderqueer people with disabilities have safe, accessible bathrooms and changing space?[1] 

·      A number of disabilities and disabling conditions require people to use the toilet frequently.  It can be very helpful to have bathrooms close to Meeting rooms, though this is not always something under our control. 

Seating

·      Is the Meeting community familiar with the different kinds of seating Friends need?  Are different kinds of seating available during worship, social time, Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, and committee meetings? 

·      For some people, benches might be fine.  Some people need soft seating.  Some can’t use soft chairs and need a hard chair with back support.  Some people with asthma and other pulmonary problems can’t use upholstered furniture.  Having different kinds of seating available in worship but not Business Meeting, for example, communicates that Friends with disabilities are welcome in worship but not business.  Having different kinds of seating available in worship, social, and business spaces communicates that Friends with different needs are welcome in the full life of the Meeting and makes the Meeting more accessible to more Friends. 

Heating and cooling

·      Are the worship, social, and business spaces warm enough – and cool enough?  Spaces that are cold are often not accessible to people with chronic pain, arthritis, asthma and other pulmonary conditions, and neurological, orthopedic, and other disabilities.  Similarly, spaces that are too warm are also barriers to access.  To non-disabled Friends, a meeting space that is too cool or too warm is an inconvenience; to many disabled Friends, a meeting space that is too cool or too warm is inaccessible and means we can’t participate, or that if we do participate we will face consequences such as increased pain and disability. 

Timing and scheduling

·      Are the schedules for worship, business, and social events available in advance?  Does the community adhere to those schedules, especially with respect to break times and meals? 

·      People with various disabilities may need to use the bathroom more often, may need to eat at regular intervals, may need to time medication to food, may not be able to sit for extended periods, and more.  Asking, “Is it all right if we go on?” puts PWDs on the spot and forces us to ask for our access needs to be respected.  Adhering to schedules helps us plan and makes events more accessible to more people.[2]

·      Do the times for Meeting for Worship, Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, and committee meetings work for people with disabilities?  Has the X Committee in your Meeting always met on the first Thursday night of the month, and always will? 

·      It may be traditional to hold Meeting for Worship on First Day morning, but having worship even once a month in the afternoon or evening might make it possible for people to come who otherwise can’t.  Scheduling Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business is always an extremely interesting process, and it’s all too easy for the voices of people with disabilities to get lost, for our presence to become less of a priority than that of other Friends.  If X committee always meets at night, Friends for whom night-time committee meetings aren’t possible may never even consider serving on X committee, and may never be asked, even if the Meeting very much needs their gifts there. 

·      How are late-comers welcomed? 

·      People with disabilities cannot always know how long it will take us to get ready or to get someplace, and those of us who rely on other people or on public transit to get to Meeting are not always in control of what time we arrive.  Shaming late-comers, treating lateness as a problem, and making late-comers sit in a separate area communicates that people with disabilities are not welcome, that it would be better if we hadn’t come at all than had come but arrived late. 

Microphones

·      Does your Meeting have a sound system?  Do people use it? 

·      A good sound system is an essential accessibility tool for many Meetings.  It’s very easy, and very tempting, to believe a meeting space is small enough, or people’s voices are loud enough, that everyone can hear.  Shouting does not, in fact, make it possible for everyone to hear; for many of us, it makes it harder.  Accessibility for Friends who are hard of hearing is not simply about volume; it’s about a whole host of factors.  Hearing loops do not serve all Friends and newcomers who are hard of hearing. 

·      It’s also very easy to assume that using microphones in Meeting for Worship will be disruptive, unwieldy, or too difficult.  There are a number of Meetings and other Quaker groups whose experience with the use of microphones during Meeting for Worship and Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business has been extremely positive, including Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns (FLGBTQC).[3] 

Fragrance

·      Is the soap in the bathrooms fragrance-free?  Is the space cleaned with fragrance-free products? 

·      Is it a Meeting policy to ask Friends and visitors to forego using fragranced personal care products, including perfume, cologne, aftershave, hair styling products, and lotions when coming to Meeting events, and not to use them on the premises? 

·      Is that policy clearly stated on the website, in signs on-site, and in printed and emailed announcements?  Are there periodic written and verbal announcements to remind Friends? 

·      How do Friends, and especially elders in the community and/or the equivalent(s) of Ministry and Counsel, intervene when people do wear or use fragranced products? 

·      Most commercially-available window cleaners contain chemicals which often trigger headaches, breathing difficulties, and neurological problems.  Many eco-friendly window cleaning products which contain ingredients such as vinegar and vegetable-based soaps are much less hazardous to people with disabling conditions.  These are also easy and inexpensive to make; ingredients and recipes are readily available on-line and in books. 

·      Please note that while many products marketed as eco-friendly are fragrance-free, not all of them are; many contain essential oils to make products smell “nice.”  The fragrances in essential oils can still trigger problems.  Look for explicitly fragrance-free products (not necessarily “unscented”).  It’s essential to read ingredients lists.

·      It’s important that keeping a space as fragrance-free as possible is everyone’s responsibility, not just that of people with disabilities or Friends with chemical sensitivities.  It’s ableist and unfair for expect a particular subset of Friends to carry the burden of removing an obstacle to their participation in the life of the Meeting, and in fact it creates another obstacle in and of itself.

·      Please do not, ever, ask someone with fragrance or chemical sensitivities to smell something and tell you whether it’s all right.  Doing so is asking them to risk being made very ill, not being able to get home safely, and being disabled for days.  Read labels. 

·      A number of Quaker and non-Quaker organizations and individuals keep lists of fragrance-free personal care and cleaning products on-line, including Friends General Conference[4] and this author.[5] 

Food

·      When providing food or at potlucks, does the Meeting make provision for a wide range of food needs, rather than what is perceived as the lowest common denominator?  For potlucks, are Friends encouraged to bring a variety of foods? 

·      When life-threatening allergies exist, does the Meeting insist Friends not bring foods containing those specific allergens?

·      Is food labeling part of the Meeting’s culture and expectations?  Are there supplies available so people who have not made labels at home can do so on-site?  Do Friends commonly help make labels for people for whom writing is difficult or painful, or who can’t see?

·      Does everyone understand it’s critical not to mix serving utensils without a thorough washing? 

·      Do Friends respect each others’ food needs? 

·      Avoid commenting on and questioning food preferences and restrictions. Don’t ask someone why they can’t eat something, don’t tell them that someone else you know who has the same disability or medical condition can eat the thing they’re not eating, don’t tell them their inability to eat something is a fad, don’t tell them the food they’re not eating won’t really hurt them.  That’s ableist and disrespectful.  Most of all, don’t try to convince people to eat things they say they can’t eat, and do not deliberately serve them food or drink containing something they have said they can’t eat.  That’s dangerous. 

Managing dust and mold

·      Are your worship, social, and business spaces cleaned regularly, with fragrance-free products?  Are the cushions vacuumed?  Are moisture and mold managed? 

·      Dust and mold are problems for people with allergies, neurological and pulmonary conditions, and more.  There are a number of lovely Meeting houses that are inaccessible to people with disabilities and chronic illnesses because of mold and dust problems. 

Names

·      Are name tags available, and do people wear them consistently? 

·      Is it a Meeting practice to share names verbally at the rise of Meeting, or at the beginning of Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, committee meetings, and other Meeting events, even if it’s believed everyone knows each other? 

·      Some people with learning disabilities, memory problems, or neurological disabilities will never be able to learn everyone’s names, no matter how long they’ve been part of a Meeting community and no matter how hard they try.  They may have known you for twenty years and can remember everything you’ve told them about your garden, they may know your name most of the time, but at any given moment they may not be able to pull your name from memory.  People who cannot recognize faces might or might not be able to discern people’s names from other cues.  Name tags are an access tool: they make it possible for many people with disabilities to use people’s names, literally giving them access to names they wouldn’t otherwise have.

·      People who cannot see or who have low vision have no way know who is present at Meeting unless people’s names are shared verbally.  In some meetings, whether small or large, it is the custom to go around the room at the rise of worship and share everyone’s names.  This helps people with neurological, memory, or learning disabilities as well as people who can’t see everyone. 

Noise

·      Are side conversations discouraged during announcements, Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, and committee meetings, so that everyone may hear? 

·      Are the people speaking during announcements, Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, and committee meetings clearly visible to everyone in the room who is able to see?  Are there clear lines of sight so that people who are hard of hearing or Deaf/deaf are able to see people’s faces and lips when they are speaking?

·      Are there quiet spaces available at the rise of Meeting, and during social time and other events, for people for whom noise is painful, overwhelming, or may trigger a disabling medical event? 

·      It can be very difficult for people who have sensory issues and/or who are hard of hearing to hear what is being said when there is background noise or conversation, including side conversations.  People who have sensory and/or other neurological issues, or who use hearing aids, can have real difficulty in noisy spaces or spaces with a lot of background noise.  Discouraging side conversations during announcements and other business, and making sure quiet spaces are available during social time, makes Meeting more accessible to more people. 

·      Are ultrasonic rodent repellents turned off during Meeting for Worship, Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, social time, committee meetings, and other events? 

·      Ultrasonic rodent repellents are known to cause headaches for many Friends. 

Touch

·      Does the Meeting practice consent culture?[6]  Do people ask before touching each other, whether putting a hand on their arm or giving a hug?  Is “No” a socially-acceptable answer?  Are Friends welcoming if someone waves or blows kisses instead of hugging? 

·      Are children encouraged to decide for themselves whether to hug or kiss adults, or to accept hugs or kisses from them?  Are children taught to ask before touching adults or other children, even in affection?

·      For many Friends with who have sensory issues, balance problems, neurological conditions, orthopedic conditions, chronic pain, other disabilities, and/or who are survivors of interpersonal violence, touch can be painful, overwhelming, or actually dangerous. 

·      People with disabilities have a higher likelihood than non-disabled people to have experienced assault. 

·      Non-disabled people often touch disabled people without their consent when trying to be helpful: for example, moving a blind person to where they believe that person needs to be or is trying to go; moving someone’s wheelchair; etc.  This is an invasion of personal space.  It can also be actively dangerous for people with various disabilities and disabling conditions.  Always ask before touching.  Never “help” a PWD without asking for and gaining consent first.

·      How does your Meeting cue the end of worship? 

·      How do people who are Deaf/deaf, blind or have low vision know Meeting has ended? 

·      If your Meeting shakes hands, what transition is there between worship and hand-shaking for people who cannot go directly from worship to touching other people? 

·      Are alternative greetings besides hand-shaking available and welcome for people for whom going from worship to touching means sensory overstimulation or is unsafe, or who simply don’t like touch?  Are Friends welcoming and supportive if someone waves or nods instead of shaking hands? 

Announcements

·      Are printed and emailed announcements available? 

·      These help people with auditory processing difficulties, poor short-term memory, and cognitive problems, people who have low vision or are blind and use screen-readers on their computers, people who are hard of hearing, and others. 

Signs

·      Are there clear signs in the building?  Can people with short-term memory problems who may not remember verbal directions to the Meeting room, social hall, or bathrooms still find those places? 

Child care / children’s programming

·      Is child care available for young children with disabilities?  Is the program for older children accessible to children with disabilities, whether they can’t sit still, have sensory processing difficulties, use a wheelchair, have developmental disabilities, or have other access needs?

Movement during worship

·      Are Friends encouraged to move quietly during worship when they need to?  Are Friends supported in doing handwork, reading, writing, standing, walking, wiggling, or fidgeting to stay centered in worship? 

·      Are Friends easily able to leave the room to use the bathroom, eat, or take medication, and easily able to return? 

·      Do Friends accept noise from medical equipment, service animals, or adults or children getting up, turning pages of a book, etc., as a blessing of being in beloved community?  Is worship deep enough that such noise is absorbed without disturbance?

Ramps, elevators, and hearing loops revisited

·      This may seem obvious, but: 1) Do they work?, and 2) Is the entire space accessible, not just the Meeting room? 

·      Are there automatic doors?  Can someone who uses a wheelchair get into the building, get into worship space, and also get into social space and business space?  Does the elevator fit a wheelchair?  Can someone who uses a wheelchair actually use the bathroom? 

·      Does the hearing loop work?  Where is it available?  Are events always held in spaces where it is available and working? 

Availability of information

·      Is information about accessibility freely available on-line and in printed materials, where both established members of the community and newcomers can find it easily?  Does someone already need to be a member of the community in order to have their access needs met, to be welcome if they have a disability?

·      Are minutes and materials for Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business available electronically? 

·      This is helpful for people who use screen readers.  It also helps people who cannot always be present in person to stay active in the life of the community. 

·      Is your website screen-reader compatible?[7]

·      Does your website have pop-ups? 

·      Many websites hosted on free providers have pop-ups, which often make it difficult for people with visual or motor issues to navigate web sites. 

·      Having good information available on your website, including newsletters and minutes, makes it easier for Friends with different disabilities to participate fully in the life of the Meeting.  If you do not want minutes to be available to the public, they may be password-protected using various tools, including the Quaker Cloud.[8]





[1] Gender-neutral changing space is an issue of safety and accessibility for people who are transgender, non-binary, and genderqueer.  
[2] This is also an issue for families with children and/or who are caring for adult loved ones. 
[3] For more information, contact Co-Clerks via the webform at http://flgbtqc.quaker.org/contactus.html
 
[5] Please see http://stasa.net/resources/fragrance-free-resources/ for some of many fragrance-free organizations, events, and products.  
[6] An excellent resource for consent culture in spiritual communities is the anthology Pagan Consent Culture: Building Communities of Empathy and Autonomy, edited by Christine Hoff Kraemer and Yvonne Aburrow (Hubbardsville, MA: Asphodel Press, 2015).  The anthology includes work by several Quaker authors.  Available in print or as an e-book at http://www.paganconsentculture.com/. 

For a shorter introductory exploration of consent culture within Quaker contexts, see “Some Experiences with a Culture of Consent and Radical Inclusion,” available at http://aquakerwitch.blogspot.co.uk/2014/04/some-experiences-with-culture-of.html.  
[7] Websites on FGC’s Quaker Cloud tool are not yet fully screen-reader compatible, but have many features that work well with screen readers.  The Quaker Cloud team strongly welcomes Meetings' interest in getting the Quaker Cloud fully optimized for screen readers.  Contact them at cloudsupport@fgcquaker.org or 215-561-1700, or see http://www.fgcquaker.org/services/quaker-cloud for more information. 

[8] For more information, please see http://www.fgcquaker.org/services/quaker-cloud or call 215-561-1700.