Quaker support for banning conversion therapy

At our recent special called Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, South Edinburgh Quakers expressed our support for making conversion therapy for gender and/or sexual orientation illegal in Scotland.  

Attached below please find an email from Rici Marshall-Cross, Clerk of South Edinburgh Local Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers), about our recent Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, as well as our minute and our submission to the Scottish government consultation on banning conversion therapy.   

----

Dear Friends,

The Scottish Government is holding a consultation on a law to ban the provision or promotion of LGBT+ conversion therapy in Scotland. Friends in South Edinburgh Local Meeting encourage other Friends to make a submission, which you can do here: https://yourviews.parliament.scot/ehrc/petition-end-conversion-therapy-views/ . The deadline for the consultation is 13th August. Submissions do not need to be lengthy. In this email is a bit of background and the minute from South Edinburgh local meeting, including our response, which may help with ideas for the submission. Many of us were not aware that conversion therapy is not already illegal. Stasa Morgan-Appel is happy to talk to anyone who would like to discuss the issue. Her details are in the book of members, or I can pass them on.

Conversion therapy (or ‘cure’ therapy or reparative therapy) refers to any form of treatment or psychotherapy which aims to change a person’s sexual orientation or to suppress a person’s gender identity. It is based on an assumption that being lesbian, gay, bi or trans is a mental illness that can be ‘cured’. These therapies are both unethical and harmful. (definition taken from Stonewall https://www.stonewall.org.uk/campaign-groups/conversion-therapy)

In 2018 the UK Government committed to ban conversion therapy in the UK, and this commitment was repeated in the 2021 Queen's Speech. However, the process is facing further delays at the UK level. The SNP committed in their 2021 manifesto that if the UK government failed to ban conversion therapy, then it would seek to ban it in Scotland. The consultation we are responding to is part of the Scottish process to ban LGBT+ conversion therapy.

You can find more information here:

• Background to the petition: https://yourviews.parliament.scot/ehrc/petition-end-conversion-therapy-views/

• Background information about the petition, including some very sobering statistics about LGBTQIA+ people's experiences that help show why advocates believe a ban is necessary https://petitions.parliament.scot/petitions/PE1817

• The 2018 National Faith & Sexuality Survey which was designed to examine the role religious belief has on people’s understanding and acceptance of their sexual orientation in the UK. ( you can access it online here https://www.ozanne.foundation/faith-sexuality-survey-2018/)

We hope that this information will be useful for Friends.  

The link to the consultation is here: https://yourviews.parliament.scot/ehrc/petition-end-conversion-therapy-views/

In Friendship,

Rici and Stasa

----

South Edinburgh Local Meeting 

Meeting for Worship for Business 25th July 2021 

Minutes of Special Meeting 

21.7.1. Submission to Government consultation on banning LGBT+ conversion therapy

Stasa Morgan-Appel has brought to our attention the Scottish Government consultation on banning LGBT+ conversion therapy. The closing date for submissions is 13th August.

We were reminded in our worship this morning by the words of Quaker Faith and Practice 22.16 that it is fear and vulnerability that often makes people afraid of those who are different. We affirm our belief that sexual orientation and gender identity are sacred gifts.

We agree that we would like to make a submission as a meeting. We affirm the draft wording prepared by Stasa, and thank her for preparing this. We ask Stasa and our clerk, Rici Marshall Cross to submit this on the government portal on our behalf

We ask Rici to send information to Sue Proudlove to send out to all Friends in Scotland to encourage them to make submissions to the consultation. We agree to discuss this topic with our MSP, Daniel Johnson when we meet him in August.

Wording of our submission

Section 1 - What are your views on the action called for in the petition?

South Edinburgh Local Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends, in keeping with our Quaker Testimony of  Equality,  affirms our continued leading as a faith community to treat people who are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer, intersex, or asexual in the same way as we treat people who are heterosexual or cisgender, and to advocate for the rights of LGBTQIA+ people to be treated equally in society.  

We therefore support a ban on all practices that seek to change a person's sexual orientation and/or gender identity.

In 2009, Britain Yearly Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers) stated plainly that as a faith community, “...we are being led to treat same sex committed relationships in the same way as opposite sex marriages.”   In 2013, South Edinburgh Local Meeting responded to the Scottish Government consultation on same-sex marriage in support of a change to the law in order to treat same-sex couples equally to opposite-sex couples.  Also in 2013, Southeast Scotland Area Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers) joined other faith bodies in Scotland to support changing marriage law in Scotland to include same-sex couples, eventually leading to our support for the Marriage and Civil Partnership Act (Scotland) 2014.         

We believe that both sexual orientation and gender identity are sacred gifts.  We are deeply troubled by the harm caused to people who have been subjected to conversion therapy for gender identity and/or sexual orientation.  We would oppose efforts to change heterosexual people's sexual orientation; we would oppose efforts to change cisgender people's gender, ie, the gender identity of people whose gender identify is consistent with the gender they were assigned at birth.  We oppose efforts to change the sexual orientation and/or gender of LGBTQIA+ people.    

We support the following action items:  

• A comprehensive ban on conversion therapy, accompanied by support to survivors and communities impacted by these practices, as both necessary and urgent.

• That the ban include all forms of conversion therapy on the basis of sexuality or gender identity without exception.

• The Scottish Government should act immediately to ban conversion therapy, without waiting for Westminster, to prevent further harm.

Section 2 - What action would you like to see the Scottish Government take?

• The implementation of a criminal ban on the promotion, provision, causing of a person to undergo conversion therapy or removing a person from the UK to undergo conversion therapy abroad.

• Training on safeguarding and awareness in the public health service and private healthcare providers, and the establishment of an anonymous reporting system.

• Outreach and engagement with religious and community leaders including training to explain the impact of certain teachings on LGBTQIA+ members of their communities.

• Outreach and support for survivors and communities affected by conversion therapy.

Section 3 - Do you have suggestions on how the Committee can take forward its consideration of the petition (e.g. who should it talk to and hear from)?

• Survivors and those who have come to harm through conversion therapy should be at the forefront of any decision making.

• LGBTQIA+ rights groups and mental health experts should also be invited to provide evidence and inform the committee on the best approach to supporting survivors.

• Legal expertise from those with experience in implementing Scottish law in similar areas, for example in domestic abuse, hate crime, and coercive control legislation should be considered to examine the possible application and impact of a criminal ban.

A love note from your Recording Clerk

This is an email I recently sent to the list-serv for Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns (FLGBTQC): 

It's been a little over a year since Nominating Committee approached me and asked if I'd be willing to consider serving as FLGBTQC Recording Clerk.

To say I was surprised is putting it mildly.  Recording clerking is really, truly, absolutely Ministry That Would Not Have Occurred to Me.

Taking minutes by hand is painful for me.  I didn't have a laptop until very recently.  I am a terrible minute-taker in secular meetings.  I had never been remotely interested in being a recording clerk, and had in fact actively avoided recording for committee meetings.  It never occurred to me that I might have skills which are good for a recording clerk to have, or that I could be good as a recording clerk.

What changed?

Well, when I carefully asked F/friends on Nominating if there were any particular reasons they'd thought of me (I'm sure my dubiousness was thinly cloaked), I got a lot of really good answers.  The kind which sounded to me like Friends were listening to Spirit, and also like they know me pretty well, and were putting what they know of me together with things I hadn't thought of and the needs of the community.  (Go, Nominating.  This is a form of eldering: helping people recognize gifts of the Spirit they haven't recognized in themselves, and asking that those gifts be used in the service of the Spirit and the community.)

In Britain Yearly Meeting, Presiding Clerks record.  If I wasn't willing to learn to record, that meant I was cutting myself off from the possibility of serving as clerk of my Local Meeting or Area Meeting.  It meant I was deciding for Spirit ahead of time that I would never do this work.  That struck me as a Bad Idea.  

But the big thing that decided me was you, collectively.  Was this community.  I realized that if I was going to learn to be a Recording Clerk, I couldn't think of a better place to do it.  I have have been part of the Meeting holding newly-fledged co-clerks as they found their wings.  I knew you would hold me, as you / we always hold the clerking team, and that even if it wasn't particularly graceful, there would still be grace.  Lots of grace.

I began to feel really grateful for this opportunity, and excited about learning a whole new skill.

After I went on the clerks' training course at Woodbrooke, I knew I had what I needed, except for the experience of actually doing it.  And I was pretty sure I could be a good-enough recording clerk while you helped me become a better recording clerk.

The really good news is that it turns out I truly enjoy recording clerking.  Who knew?  And I really enjoyed being part of Quaker process in this particular way, a way I never have before, during our Meetings for Worship with Attention to Business last summer.

I love Quaker process.  I have always especially loved Quaker process in the FLGBTQC community.  Being able to come to our Meetings for Worship with Attention to Business has helped sustain me during some periods which were particularly dry when it came to spiritual community.

I also love nurturing Quaker process, and I love that this service is another way I can help do that within FLGBTQC.

Right now, many of us are getting ready for Mid-Winter Gathering and for our Meetings for Worship with Attention to Business there.

So, I ask that you continue to hold me, and the entire clerking team, in the Light and in love, in that same way I knew deep down I could count on you to do while I learned I could do something I had never done before.

With love,
Stasa

p.s.  Thank you.

Friends (Quakers) for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns Endorses Friend of the Court Briefs in Two Supreme Court Cases -- Announcement

[UPDATE: Briefs are available to read here.] 


Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns (FLGBTQC) has signed friend of the court briefs filed filed by law firm Kramer Levin on behalf of a range of religious organizations in two cases before the US Supreme Court this term.

From the announcement by Kramer Levin:

Kramer Levin has filed a pair of amicus briefs on behalf of a broad-based coalition of religious organizations in the historic LGBT rights cases now pending in the U.S Supreme Court...

Confronting and rebutting arguments by religious supporters of DOMA and Proposition 8 purporting to state a uniform religious position on marriage, the briefs document the growing range of religious traditions that respect the dignity of lesbian and gay people and their families; solemnize or otherwise honor their relationships; and support civil marriage equality. And stressing the distinction between religious and civil marriage, the briefs make clear that respecting the marriage rights of same-sex couples will not impinge upon religious beliefs, practices, or operations, but rather will prevent one set of religious beliefs from being imposed through civil law.

http://www.kramerlevin.com/Kramer-Levin-Files-Briefs-in-Historic-Supreme-Court-LGBT-Rights-Cases-02-27-2013/

The entire announcement is well worth reading.  

From the briefs:

Amicus curiae
Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns (“FLGBTQC”) is a faith community within the Religious Society of Friends. FLGBTQC deeply honors, affirms, and upholds that of God in all people. 

Links:

• Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns: http://flgbtqc.quaker.org/
• FLGBTQC Collection of Marriage Minutes: http://flgbtqc.quaker.org/marriageminutes.html
• Info at the Supreme Court website: http://www.supremecourt.gov/docket/DOMPRP8.aspx
• The Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), at question in US v Windsor: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Defense_of_Marriage_Act
• California's Proposition 8, at question in Hollingsworth et al v Perry et al: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/California_Proposition_8
• Kramer Levin announcement: http://www.kramerlevin.com/Kramer-Levin-Files-Briefs-in-Historic-Supreme-Court-LGBT-Rights-Cases-02-27-2013/
• Kramer Levin brief for Windsor case: http://www.kramerlevin.com/files/Publication/909bbf32-d359-4545-8429-062418acf8ac/Presentation/PublicationAttachment/e9b8e654-0b45-474c-bc64-079710fa0583/Windsor%20Religion%20Brief.pdf
• Kramer Levin brief for Perry case: http://www.kramerlevin.com/files/Publication/909bbf32-d359-4545-8429-062418acf8ac/Presentation/PublicationAttachment/5ba021d4-1733-417e-acc3-077dd49888e3/Perry%20Religion%20Brief.pdf
• Tracking the Windsor case at SCOTUSblog: http://www.scotusblog.com/case-files/cases/windsor-v-united-states-2/
• Tracking the Perry case at SCOTUSblog: http://www.scotusblog.com/case-files/cases/hollingsworth-v-perry/
• Tracking the Windsor case at GLAD: http://www.glad.org/doma/documents/

(Please note, not all the briefs filed in these cases have been uploaded to all the tracking websites yet.)

Please see related post "Friends (Quakers) for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns Endorses Friend of the Court Briefs in Two Supreme Court Cases -- Details" at http://aquakerwitch.blogspot.com/2013/03/friends-quakers-for-lesbian-gay.html  

Friends (Quakers) for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns Endorses Friend of the Court Briefs in Two US Supreme Court Cases -- Details

[UPDATE: Briefs are available to read here.]

I recently attended the Mid-Winter Gathering of Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns (FLGBTQC).

During our first Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, one of our co-clerks brought a two-fold request to us from the law firm Kramer Levin, regarding friend of the court (amicus) briefs they were preparing to file in two civil same-sex marriage cases:

• One, could we provide them with information on any policies from the Quaker equivalents of, for example, dioceses, supporting equal marriage for same-sex couples?
• Two, would we endorse the briefs (become a signatory to the friend of the court briefs), with the understanding that they were not sure that, if we said yes, they would be able to use our name, that our name might not appear after all?

I agreed to serve on the committee looking at both these issues and bringing a recommendation back to Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business.

Co-Clerk had, I believe, already explained about Quakers' lack of dioceses, and so we set about finding information on the Yearly Meeting level -- much of which FLGBTQC already has compiled in our Collection of Marriage Minutes. Without disclosing why, I also posted electronic requests for information from other Yearly Meetings, to which a number of Friends who were not at Mid-Winter Gathering responded with resources.

When our committee met, several of us sat down to work our way through the draft brief to make sure we understood it before making a recommendation. Thankfully, it was very readable.

It was also, simply, a pleasure to read. The authors went through through many of the arguments set forth in briefs already filed in the cases in opposition to same-sex civil marriage, and just demolished them, simply and clearly, without ever being insulting; I was impressed.

You can read an outline of these arguments in this announcement, and you can read the originals of the briefs here and here. I highly recommend doing both -- as I said, the briefs are very readable -- but do read at least the announcement.

(It turns out I kept sending many people at the committee table into gales of laughter by blurting out, "Oh my gosh! This is brilliant!" over and over while I was reading.)

The law firm had also clearly done some good background research on Friends; we had a few factual corrections we asked them to make, but by and large they "got it right."

We took a summary and a recommendation for endorsement to Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, where it was approved.

However, no matter how excited or happy I was, or how brilliant the draft brief, I couldn't talk about it, because until the brief was filed, it was client confidential.

Kramer Levin filed the briefs Thursday, 28 February, 2013 (yesterday)!

Here's Kramer Levin's announcement:

• Kramer Levin Files Briefs in Historic Supreme Court LGBT Rights Cases

http://www.kramerlevin.com/Kramer-Levin-Files-Briefs-in-Historic-Supreme-Court-LGBT-Rights-Cases-02-27-2013/

I highly recommend reading the announcement itself for a nice summary of the briefs' arguments.

I was also struck very much at the time by the parallels to the arguments of Friends in Britain regarding same-sex marriage, particularly General Meeting for Scotland's response in November of 2011 to the Scottish Government's Consultation on same-sex marriage. General Meeting for Scotland's statement is here; Britain Yearly Meeting's statements on same-sex marriage in general are here.

• The brief for Hollingsworth v Perry (the CA Prop 8 case)

http://www.kramerlevin.com/files/Publication/909bbf32-d359-4545-8429-062418acf8ac/Presentation/PublicationAttachment/5ba021d4-1733-417e-acc3-077dd49888e3/Perry%20Religion%20Brief.pdf

• The brief for US v Windsor (the DOMA case from NY State)

http://www.kramerlevin.com/files/Publication/909bbf32-d359-4545-8429-062418acf8ac/Presentation/PublicationAttachment/e9b8e654-0b45-474c-bc64-079710fa0583/Windsor%20Religion%20Brief.pdf

There are so many reasons I'm excited about these two briefs, but here are a few:

1. I had a very small but direct impact on some of the content of the brief. (I mean, holy shit.)
2. It's a bunch of religious groups saying not only do DOMA and Prop 8 infringe on our religious freedom, but marriage equality does not infringe on any other religious groups' religious freedom, in spite of all their arguments.
3. It demolishes all those arguments just brilliantly.
4. A religious group I'm part of is a signatory / amicus curiae.

More briefs

If you'd like an amazing experience, grab a hankie and do a news search in your favorite search engine for "marriage briefs" or "DOMA briefs."

You will find reports of briefs supporting same-sex marriage from a huge array of groups and individuals -- religious groups, employers, unions, NFL players, advocacy groups, US states, doctors and psychologists, the Department of Justice, Democrats, Republicans, and more.

That's just not something I ever thought I'd see in my lifetime.


Following the cases

Here are a couple of places to follow the cases:

• SCOTUSblog on US v Windsor (DOMA): http://www.scotusblog.com/case-files/cases/windsor-v-united-states-2/

• SCOTUSblog on Hollingsworth et al v Perry et al: http://www.scotusblog.com/case-files/cases/hollingsworth-v-perry/

• GLAD (Gay and Lesbian Advocates and Defenders): http://www.glad.org/doma/documents

(Please note they're still catching up on linking all the briefs on all of these pages.)


Related announcement

Please see related post "Friends (Quakers) for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns Endorses Friend of the Court Briefs in Two Supreme Court Cases -- Announcement" at http://aquakerwitch.blogspot.com/2013/03/friends-quakers-for-lesbian-gay_4.html.

Same-sex Quaker marriage minutes?

I am looking for same-sex marriage minutes from larger Quaker bodies, preferably US.  I'm afraid I need them in rather a hurry, as I have just taken on this task, and it has a very quick deadline. 

 

Here are the ones I have so far. If you know of any others, please send them to me as soon as possible. 

 

Thanks so much!!

 

I need larger Quaker bodies, mostly US. I have the following US (and other) Yearly Meetings, from the FLGBTQC collection of marriage minutes (http://flgbtqc.quaker.org/marriageminutes.html):

Yearly Meetings:

• Britain
• Canadian
• Illinois
• North Pacific
• Philadelphia
• South Central
• Sweden

Updated information on FLGBTQC Mid-Winter Gathering

Updated information on Mid-Winter Gathering of Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns!  

As in the past, the Midwinter Gathering will be held over Presidents' Weekend - February 15-18, 2013.

LOCATION: The Gathering will be held at Bryn Mawr Mountain Conference Center. This is located in Honesdale, PA, which is in the Poconos. (Note: This is NOT in Philadelphia, and it's NOT in the town of Bryn Mawr with which you may be familiar because of a Quaker college of that name which is in that town.)  Here is the website for the conference center at Bryn Mawr Mountain: http://www.brynmawrmountain.com/

TRANSPORTATION: The nearest airport to Bryn Mawr Mountain is the Wilkes-Barre/Scranton Airport (AVP), located about 1 hour away. This is a smaller airport, but our research indicates that it is actually less expensive to fly to this airport from most major cities in the US. Other airport options include: Lehigh Valley/Allentown (ABE) - 2 hours away. Newark (EWR) - 2 1/2 hours away. Philadelphia (PHL) - over 3 hours away. We strongly encourage you to use the Scranton airport if possible!

We are working on a way to provide shared transportation from Philadelphia to the Gathering. It is likely that we will arrange a bus or vas, as we anticipate a large number of attendees from the Philadelphia area. If you are coming from the Philadelphia area, please be assured that we will have updates for you as soon as possible on how we can help you get to the Gathering!

REGISTRATION: The registration form will be available soon (thank you for your patience!), but we do now have the information about registration fees. The standard adult rate will be $260 (per adult, for the whole weekend, all meals included). Some of the rooms are "summer camp" style (3-6 bunk beds, shared bathroom); others are "dormitory" style (1 bunk bed, 1 single bed, bathrooms on the hall) -- all these rooms are $260 per adult. There are a few rooms available which are further separated from the rest of the campus and have private baths; these rooms will be $280 (per adult). The rate for teens (age 13-18) will be $100, and for children (3-12) will be $60 (per teen/child, full weekend, all meals included). Children 2 and under can attend for free.

If you have questions... please know that your question may be answered soon as we will have much more information available for you, hopefully within the next few weeks!

We're looking forward to a really awesome Gathering and hope to see you there! Please stay tuned for further updates!

Recommended article: "I Crochet Because I'm Hooked" (Tape Flags and First Thoughts)

"I Crochet Because I'm Hooked" (Tape Flags and First Thoughts)
http://tapeflags.blogspot.com/2012/05/i-crochet-because-im-hooked.html

I crocheted my way through the Midwinter Gathering, and liked it. I felt like I had joined the community of stitchy people. But I was also interested to notice that crocheting seemed to keep me from blurting out jokes at inappropriate times during business meeting, one of my less attractive habits. I also found that having my hands busy allowed me to focus my mind more effectively; often I have a notebook open in biz meeting, and end up doodling or thinking about to-do lists or starting to write something. A pen and a blank sheet of paper is too appealing.

(Disclaimer up-front: Su links to an article of mine in her post.  I didn't know that when I started reading her post, and had already decided I wanted to link to her post, because I like what she said and it made me think.)

I wish I had figured it out about handwork earlier.  My love affair with Quaker process would have gone more smoothly, earlier, I think, if I had had some form of handwork in Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business sooner.  Actually, I did want to do handwork earlier, and even tried to learn to knit for the third time -- and failed for the third time.

But, I learned to crochet when I did, and it definitely helps keep me centered, and helps me listen better.

Looking at Su's pictures, I have a vision of her making a rainbow octopi for the FLGBTQC auction at FGC Gathering. *grin*

A question about "Pagan" Quaker process

There's been some interesting discussion recently on the QuakerPagans email discussion list -- along the lines of, since early Friends came to/developed Quaker worship through Christian scripture (and through specific passages in Christian scripture), do Pagan Friends approach Meeting for Worship, and Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, in an essentially different way?  If so, how?  (And how would one explain any difference, or lack of difference, to Christian Friends?)

What I'm sharing here is expanded from an email I wrote to that list, so it's a little bit taken out of context, and sort of me thinking out loud; but I wanted to share it anyway.

Like many modern-day Friends, I came to Friends through experience, rather than through reading Hebrew or Christian scriptures (although I was well-read in both, long before I came to Quakerism).  My participation in Meeting for Worship, and Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, is rooted most in my direct experience of That-Which-Is-Sacred, and less in written words -- in experience, not in theory, and not in anyone else's recording of their experience (although I very much appreciate attempts to put experience into words). 

I started coming to Meeting for Worship because I had a leading to come.  It's true that I initially thought that at worst, I'd get an hour of communal meditation out of it, but notice, even at the beginning, I knew that would be "at worst." 

It's not Hebrew or Christian scriptures ("the Bible") that speaks to Christian Friends in worship -- it's the Divine Presence. 

Why would I, as a Pagan Friend, not expect That-Which-Is-Sacred to speak to me/us directly in Meeting for Worship, whether "regular" worship or worship for business -- ? 

I don't pretend to have all the theaological answers about which Gods/Divine Spirits are moving through us and speaking to us in worship.  In general, it doesn't much bother me if we're experiencing different Gods, unless people start getting monotheist exclusivist about it (or, try to tell me they're all the same God).  I can accept that there is some unifying spark, some unifying something which I don't fully understand; and that also works for me as a non-theist as well as a Pagan.

To me, the bottom line is that Quakerism is bigger than Christianity.  Quaker practice is bigger than Jesus and Yhwh.  It's not limited to the God/s of Christianity.  Quaker practice can be informed by Jesus, Yhwh, Brigid, Herne, Cernunnos, Morgan, Athena, Demeter, Hecate, Cerridwen, Maiden, Mother, Crone, Air, Fire, Water, Earth, Spirit, many others, no god at all.

That's how powerful it is. 

And that's how Friends of differing theaologies can worship, and do Quaker business, together, in love and trust, asking how we're led. 

At least, that's been my experience. 

Of Quaker worship, and Quaker process, at its best, most powerful, most amazing, most magical, and most transformative.

I didn't speak up, and my conscience is ruffled

I didn't speak up.

And now I have that same feeling I do when I was led to speak in Meeting for Worship, or Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, but didn't.  Or when someone has insulted me, or someone else in my hearing, based on religion, gender, class, or something similar, and I didn't speak up.

My conscience is ruffled, like the surface of a body of water is ruffled when it is disturbed.  This uneasy feeling won't leave me.  I am not at peace.

I was at General Meeting for Scotland.  As I mentioned earlier, Meeting for Business opened with this quote from Britain Yearly Meeting's Faith and Practice:

I have been greatly exercised for some time by the image we like to present of ourselves (albeit with beating of breasts) as a white, middle-class, well-educated group of heterosexual people, preferably in stable marriages with children that behave in socially acceptable ways. I do feel that this is a myth. The danger of such myths is that we exclude many potential Quakers who feel they cannot/do not live up to the image or who feel that such a group is not one with which they wish to be associated. Sadly, many of us within the Society who do not fit in feel marginalised and second-class.

Another effect is that many problems faced by a large proportion of people are seen as separate: people who are poor, facing oppression, living in poor housing, experiencing prejudice are the 'others'. This enables us to be very caring but distant (and sometimes patronising) and also makes it difficult to be conscious of prejudice behind some of the normally accepted assumptions of our society/Society, such as that people who are unemployed are a different group from those who have employment; that poor people are poor ... because they are not as bright or as able as the rest of us or because their limited homes did not give them the opportunities that a good Quaker home would have done; that children living in single-parent families are automatically deprived by that very fact.

Until we as a Religious Society begin to question our assumptions, until we look at the prejudices, often very deeply hidden, within our own Society, how are we going to be able to confront the inequalities within the wider society? We are very good at feeling bad about injustice, we put a lot of energy into sticking-plaster activity (which obviously has to be done), but we are not having any effect in challenging the causes of inequality and oppression. I do sometimes wonder if this is because we are not able to do this within and among ourselves.

Susan Rooke-Matthews, 1993

This spoke to me deeply, and spoke to my condition.  (It also reminded me of this post.)

General Meeting for Scotland "acts on behalf of Britain Yearly Meeting in such procedures as may be required by the Scottish parliament and Scottish legal affairs." A big Scottish governmental item right now is the Scottish Government's Consultation on same-sex marriage.  And so one of the items on our agenda was the General Meeting's response to the this consultation.  (For more information about the consultation on same-sex marriage, click here.)

Friends involved with the working group for the response presented the draft of "A general statement to accompany the response submitted on behalf of The Religious Society of Friends (Quakers), General Meeting of Scotland." 

Beloved Wife and I found this a deeply moving document.  It speaks not only of equality, but also of religious liberty, of conscience, and of not imposing our discernment on other religious faiths.

However, there was one part of it which made my heart pound in a different way.  The very first sentence begins:

"Quakers are a non-hierarchical and Christian body..." 

I was not in unity with this statement.

And I didn't speak up.

...Why didn't I speak up?

I  know that there is a sizable minority of Friends in Britain who are most definitely not Christian.  I am honestly not certain yet if Britain Yearly Meeting or Friends in Britain consider themselves a Christian body or not.  Looking later, I find the Quakers in Britain website states, "The Quaker way has its roots in Christianity and finds inspiration in the Bible and the life and teachings of Jesus" (which can be interpreted as Christian, or as Christian-rooted but not by definition Christian); Britain Yearly Meeting's Faith and Practice Introduction begins, "This book of faith & practice constitutes the Christian discipline of the Yearly Meeting of the Religious Society of Friends (Quakers) in Britain" (which sounds explicitly Christian to me). 

I am even less certain how Friends in Scotland see themselves.  There's quite a bit of theaological diversity among Friends I've met here, with a lot less fuss about it than in most parts of the States I've lived or traveled in.  A lot of Pagan Friends have come out to me since I've arrived here.  Even more people have told me about other Friends they know who are Pagan, some of whom are in the broom closet, some of whom are out.  A lot of Friends seem very Pagan-friendly without worrying about whether other people will think they're Pagan, which I find tremendously refreshing.  A few Buddhist Friends have also come out to me.  So do Scottish Friends see themselves as primarily Christian, with some non-Christian members?  Do they see themselves as rooted in or springing from Christianity, but with a membership which is diverse in theaology, and that diversity essential to the body?  (A third way?)

The Quakers in Scotland website states, "Quakerism is a non-credal religion, with Christian roots, whose worship is based on silence and listening to the spirit."

(It doesn't say, "...listening to the Inward Christ," which would be clearly Christian, or even, "...listening to God.")

My experience of Quakerism and of Friends in the US and the UK is that Quakerism is not Christian.  I know too many non-Christian Friends: Pagan Friends, Non-Theist Friends, Jewish Friends, Buddhist Friends, not-sure-how-to-label-themselves or not-willing-to-label-themselves Friends, who are not Christian.  I know too many Quaker bodies which do not identify as Christian, though they acknowledge their Christian heritage. The Monthly Meeting and Yearly Meeting in the US where I still have my membership are theaologically diverse, and while in both bodies we acknowledge our Christian roots, we do not identify as Christian.  My Monthly Meeting at one point was clearly led not to renew our membership in an interfaith organization which was restricted to Christian organizations; even though most of our Meeting's members are Christian, many are not, and we felt in good conscience we could not allow ourselves to be identified by others as a Christian church. 

The lived, experiential truth of real-life Friends is that Quakerism is not limited to Christianity.

Therefore, it's not accurate to say Quakers are Christian, or that as a body we are Christian.

Yes, it may be perfectly accurate to say a particular body of Friends is Christian.  If that body is in unity about such a statement.  

But that body cannot speak for all Friends, and cannot speak categorically for Friends.

Whether Quakerism is majority Christian is completely beside the point.

Quakerism is majority straight, white, middle-class, cisgender, and (temporarily) able-bodied, but we would never say, categorically, things like:

• "Quakers are a non-hierarchical body and white body..." (or, "Quakers are a non-hierarchical body of people of European descent...")
• "Quakers are a non-hierarchical and heterosexual body..."

...and so forth.

I, sitting there in that room, a Friend in Scotland to whom that document applied, am not Christian.  And I was not in unity with that statement, "Quakers are a non-hierarchical and Christian body..."  (Not any more than I would have been in unity with any of those other statements above.)

So: why didn't I speak up? 

I had several options in that moment.  I could have asked a clarifying question.  I could have stood aside, not blocking, acknowledging that this was still rightly-ordered for the body even though I was not in unity with it.  If I truly felt that saying "Quakers are a... Christian body" is not true and is a violation of the testimony of integrity for us as a body, that this was doing violence to non-Christian Friends and to all Friends in Scotland General Meeting, I could have gone further, but I would have had to have been very, very clearly led.  (Which I was not; what I was, was deeply uncomfortable.)

I felt deeply uncertain if, in our diversity, Scottish Friends are in unity about being a Christian body. 

So: why didn't I ask? 

I could have found out very easily.  I could have stood up to be recognized by the Clerk, and asked that question: "I know Friends in Scotland are theaologically very diverse and that we have a substantial number of non-Christian members.  Are Friends in Scotland in unity that we are a Christian body?"  

When I put myself back in that room, with my pounding heart and that sinking feeling in my stomach, why didn't I ask, why didn't I speak up?

...I was afraid.

That's really what it was.  I was scared.  

I am so very conscious of being new here, even though I'm a member and even though, well, I'm here; I'm not going anywhere.

I'm so very conscious of being an American, though I'm trying to get over this so I can just listen to the guidance of the Goddess and be who She grows me being.

I'm so very conscious of being an out Pagan Friend, with an out ministry to other Pagan (and non-Pagan) Friends.  I feel exposed.  Back out there dancing on that limb by myself again.

I'd already asked a question that morning, which I felt was misunderstood and taken in a direction I hadn't meant at all.  

There are other areas of my life where I feel criticized for "talking too much."

Most of all, I guess I was afraid of that cascade of things that can happen, that does happen all too often, when I stick my head up as a minority.

Ugh!

Even though the issue we were already talking about was one of justice for a minority among us -- what's more (!), one of which I'm a member, and pretty obviously, too, sitting there holding hands with my wife, who'd also given vocal ministry as a member of a same-sex couple.

I didn't want to go there.  I didn't want those things to start happening.  I didn't want to feel more alone.  I didn't want stand up, expose myself as a further minority within my community, and risk things like being more isolated, having my concerns not heeded or simply not seen, being put down or dismissed because I'm a minority and therefore less/not important/because I'm not Christian and therefore less/not important, being told yet again that of course Quakerism is Christian even if not all Quakers are Christian, or that reality and the truth are too complicated for us to present to outsiders/too complicated for this document/not relevant to this issue...

...As if integrity and the truth are ever too complicated or irrelevant to our testimony and witness in the world and to each other.

And I kept hoping that lovely thing that sometimes happens in worship or worship for business would happen -- you know, where someone else says or brings up something, and then you don't have to.  Every other thing I was at all uncomfortable about in the draft, someone else brought up.  I really hoped someone else could be in the spotlight on this one and I would be off the hook.

It didn't happen. 

I decided to let it go, to trust the working group, to wait and see what I could find later about the supposed Christianity of Friends in Scotland.

My discomfort hasn't gone away, despite my determination to trust the working group and Meeting for Business.  And now I am acutely uncomfortable.  My peace of mind is all rumpled.

The week after General Meeting, a quote attributed to me started making its way around one particular corner of the internet.  It comes from an on-line conversation where I was describing my interpretation of part our discernment in Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, and Queer Concerns (FLGBTQC) about our changing our name.  I protested it being attributed to me -- I was interpreting, and quoting! -- but I got stuck with it.

"Our fears and other people's prejudices can not determine how we live our witness in the world and among Friends."

I am so busted.

So.  What am I going to do about my disquiet?  

I don't know yet.  Clearly, I need to do something.

In the meantime, I am listening for the Goddess to help me discern what.

And sitting in my discomfort.

And writing about it here.

I find I am feeling all sorts of reluctance to hit the "publish post" button.  I don't think I'm any more eager to post this post than I was to stand up in Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business.

But I very clearly need to.

Conflict and Quaker process

I was thinking recently about a conflict in the Meeting where I'm sojourning.  And then I found myself thinking back on conflicts -- and potential conflicts that never were -- in other Meetings and Quaker organizations I am or have been part of.

I posted the following to Facebook: 

...reflecting today that whenever I've been really angry over, disturbed about, or hurt by a conflict in a Quaker meeting or organization I've been part of, the real root of my pain hasn't been the conflict, but a lack of Quaker process. Whereas the most potentially terrible conflicts have been transformed in the deepest love through worshipful decision-making, leading-seeking, and truth-seeking together.

Thoughts?  Reflections on your own experience?

What are the parallels or analogs in Pagan groups or organizations?