Workshop evaluations summary

General feedback:

1. Did the workshop cover the topics you expected? 7 yes; 2 no.
   
2. Did the workshop stick to the subject? 9 yes; 0 no.
   
3. Was the workshop a safe place for you to share? 9 yes; 0 no.
4. Was the workshop spiritually nurturing? 9 yes; 0 no.
5. Was the workshop fun and/or interesting? 9 yes; 0 no.
6. Was the Advance Program description accurate? 6 yes; 2 no.
   
7. Did you use the information posted on the website in making a workshop selection? 7 yes; 2 no.
   
8. If you used the website, was the information helpful? 7 yes; 2 n/a.
   
9. Was the quality of worship within the workshop appropriate? 9 always; 0 sometimes; 0 not at all.
   
10. Was the leader prepared and knowledgeable? 9 always; 0 sometimes; 0 not at all.
11. Was the leader appropriately flexible? 8 always; 1 sometimes; 0 not at all.
12. Did the leader interact appropriately with the group? 9 always; 0 sometimes; 0 not at all.
13. Did the material presented speak to your condition? 8 always; 1 sometimes; 0 not at all.
14. To what extent was the amount of worship and/or worship-sharing in the workshop appropriate for you? 0 not enough; 8 about right; 1 too much.
    
15. How much daily worship and/or worship-sharing do you expect in a workshop? 1, less than 20 minutes; 7, 20-40 minutes; 1, more than 40 minutes.
    
16. Would you recommend this workshop to a Friend if it was offered at a future Gathering? 9 yes; 0 no.
    
17. Is this leader skilled enough so that would take another workshop offered by him/her, if the topic were of interest? 9 yes; 0 no.
    

19. Comments on the workshop leader:

• Stasa was a well-versed leader with a lot of knowledge in the subject area. She was flexible, encouraged participation, and adjusted plans based on interest.
• Great caring, understanding.
  
• This dear Friend I miss from my meeting, so one of the reasons I took this workshop was to spend time with her.
  
• I appreciate her capacity for discernment, her wide, deep experience, her honesty.
  
• Stasa was well prepared and capable, worship felt safe. Very capable and trustworthy.
  
• Stasa was very loving and nurturing, fun, light hearted, thoughtful, and a great leader. She was very kind and motherly to me which was exactly what I needed, being the youngest, sickest (germ wise) participant.
  
• Well informed and ready to go as the group led her.

20. Best things that happened during the workshop:

• Connections and exploring how Quakers can function with ritual.
  
• Conversation and growing closer to people in the workshop worship sharing was meaningful and powerful.
  
• Lots of good singing.
  
• Ritual, ceremony.
  
• Gathering of Friends. Getting to know the other people and having shared experiences and being safe.
  
• The closing ritual was wonderful. Sharing.
  
• Our final worship-ritual on healing.
  
• Community, education.
  
• Cleansing ritual was not only beneficial for the experience of being in a circle of other Pagans, but for emotional healing as well. I felt renewed, refreshed and loved. It was wonderful.
  

21. Troubling things about the workshop:

• I was nervous about the age difference between me and the other members, but that cleared up quickly.
  

22. Ways that the workshop did not meet expectations:

• I had hoped for more discussion. We did this on Wednesday. I would have liked every day.
  
• I thought we would be outside more. Wanted to be involved in nature more.
  
• Wednesday was a long discussion about common elements of religions that did not feel like it fit the rest of the workshop. Discussion felt dry, not experiential, then again I was very sleepy.
  
• I was not used to being in a Pagan group but after the first hour was glad they were there. As an academic, I am curious about history and the connection to ancient spiritual practice. More of this would enhance the program.
  

23. Comments on guest speaker, field trip, video, or other "special event":

• Ritual is a special event, wonderful.
  
• Both of our rituals were extraordinary, though the first was more powerful for me.
  

24. New skills, knowledge, or understanding taken from the workshop:

• I feel more balanced and solid in my own leadings. Leading ceremony.
  
• I will take the experience of being in a circle with other more knowledgeable Pagans and seeing how and why they do things.
  
• Acceptance of support of Pagan Friends.
  
• Diversity in spirituality.
  
• Some new songs and connections with like minded Friends.
  
• Circle casting, chants and other music.
  

25. How the workshop affected participants as a Friend:

• Deepened my practice. I value procedures more, understand clearness committees better.
  
• Deep worship, healing, validation of my spirituality.
  
• I feel more convicted in my beliefs as a Pagan Quaker. The community gave me strength and courage.
  
• Deepened my spiritual experience. Further broadened my spiritual basis.
  

26. Other comments for the workshop leader:

• Just what I wanted was different. I felt the workshop did go in the direction the group wanted. I held aside my direction other than small notices that would have been heard if that was what others wanted.
  
• Definitely do it again. This was amazing.
  
• Thank you.
  
• Thanks for your courage.
  
• Do some stuff outside. Very important to be in nature.
  
• I hope she receives the appreciation that she is worthy of.
  
• Hugs and blessings.
  
• Some history, druidry, celtic philosophy, perhaps to give context to temporal worship.
  

27. Other comments for the Workshops Committee:

• I don't think the Gathering mission statement correctly reflects the gathering mission. It should include the explorative edge processing nature of the workshops. This is a think/feeling tank for Quakerism. Not only inward growth but outward growth.
  
• I appreciate space at Gathering for Quaker Pagans to get together.
  
• I wonder if a workshop could be developed to form a Pagan-Quaker section for Junior Gathering.
  

Crocheting the Goddess

There's an expression my colleague Julie Middleton came up with in consultation with me as a workshop title, and which she has freely allowed me to use: Singing the Goddess.

This comes to mind about a crochet pattern I've been working out.

A few nights ago night, I think I successfully completed designing a crochet pattern for a project that's been in my head for quite a while. It's a triple moon (triple Goddess) in white on the midnight-blue background of a triangular shawl.

I've crocheted a number of triangular shawls over this last year. The first one I ever made was for the wedding of two F/friends in 2005 (of white Egyptian cotton yarn).



And then I made a shawl for myself, to help me settle into, and stay warm during, Meeting -- candy apple red, acrylic and polyester, and another one that was in my head for a long time first.


But this last year, I started making rainbow prayer/comfort/Meeting shawls for the silent auction at FLGBTQC Gatherings. So far, I've made three, and I'm most of the way through a fourth. Two are in good homes, one's waiting for me to make arrangements with the woman who bought it, and the fourth one is also already spoken for. It's very gratifying.


For my shawl and for the rainbow shawls, I've been using Lion Brand Homespun, an acrylic and polyester yarn that's sometimes a pain to work with, but that's soft and cozy, machine washes well, works up quickly, and that I'm not allergic to. (I don't think I've worked in any wool in the last year, since my asthma was so bad last fall.)

Just like the Candy Apple caught my imagination -- it reminded me of an old blanket we'd had once, where the color just made me want to wrap myself up in it; and when I saw the yarn, I knew I wanted to wrap myself up in something I made of it -- one of the blues I've used for the rainbow shawls has also inspired me. I couldn't find the bright blue I'd been using, so I ended up with Colonial instead, and it caught my imagination.


So I think this is the color I'll use for this shawl, with white for the moons (intarsia, or crocheting them in, rather than embroidering them on after).

The design works in theory. But as my acquaintance Nancy says, "I want to move to theory. Everything works in theory." So, we shall see what happens when I actually try to work it. This'll be a neat learning experience.

"what i want"

In 2000, the choir I was singing with recorded "what i want," a song based on part of a poem by Pat Lowther, with music by Stephen Smith.

This was hard for me, but a good experience. I am a survivor of domestic violence, both as a child and an adult, and Pat was murdered in 1975 by her violent and abusive husband. We'd sung the piece several times in concert, but recording produces its own additional tension. At the end of the final take of the song, I burst into tears -- relief? pain? My friend Laurie put her arms around me, and other friends, including Jen, a Coven-mate, and Mo, whom I was dating at the time, and other women in my choir also comforted me. I was okay; I had just needed to cry. I had good support and good community from women who understood, who got it.

I've had parts of the song stuck in my head today, because I'm participating in a research project at the University of Michigan on trauma and recovery, and I filled out detailed questionnaires this morning about scary things I've experienced. I feel good about the research project: the project's head researcher is very good, the project is well-designed, and it's really important to get good research on trauma recovery. But participating in the project itself is not fun.

I didn't space out about the difficult, scary, or life-threatening things I've chosen to do as an adult. Funny how choice and being an adult help. And so does support. I chose to go to a war zone to do humanitarian work (even if I didn't choose to be left there by my first team; thank the Goddess for the other folks I knew in the region); I chose to be on the Gulf Coast after a major hurricane, even if I didn't know I was going to go through another one while I was down there; I even chose to respond to the shooting in front of my house, although I sure didn't choose the shooting. I was an adult, and I took good care of myself, during all of those; and I also had good support from other people. Those experiences have had after-effects, but not like the violence I lived through as a kid and a teenager.

...to breathe
continuously the sources of sky,
a veined sail moving,
my love never setting
foot to the dark
anvil of earth

The earth has always been a source of comfort for me. It's sad for me that it doesn't seem to have been for Lowther. But that yearning for expansion of soul is something that resonates with me; it's something I've definitely experienced. I was writing about that last night: the ways in which that expansion of soul -- the opposite of constriction -- has marked both the recovery work I've done, and opportunities for more growth in front of me.

There's more... but that's a different piece of writing.

Cerridwen's Cauldron/the Cauldron of Hecate

Samhain is fast approaching. For me, it's the Third Harvest (after Lammas and Mabon), the Feast of the Beloved Dead, and the Witches' New Year. It's the time when I recognize and honor those who have gone before, mourn deaths and endings from this last year, welcome new babies born this year, and celebrate other new beginnings of the year.

In my old Coven, at Samhain, we would go around the circle, usually counter-clockwise, and take turns naming our dead and our losses. For each of those, we would put a memento into the cauldron, bowl, paper bag, or origami box that we had in the center of the circle. The year my grandfather died, for example, I saved my boarding passes from the flights to and from Florida, as well as an extra copy of the funeral program, and put them into the bowl. We would always have a supply of paper to write things on as other losses came up, and dried leaves, dried flowers, and pine needles to burn as well.

After we'd finished going around the circle, we would take our mementos to the fireplace, or take them outside, to burn -- to return those mementos to the elements, and symbolically return our losses to the Goddess, to the Earth, Air, Fire, Water, and Spirit. We would sing while burning -- Breaths; Hecate, Cerridwen; more. Often, we would cry.

Then we would come back, and go around the circle again, usually clock-wise, naming the babies and other new beginnings born that year. We would name each as we put a corresponding birthday candle on the birthday cake made especially for circle; some years, we would also light tea lights (a staple in Roses, Too! Coven) for each birth or new beginning and place them around the room. Then we'd light the birthday candles and sing -- Happy Birthday, of course; We Are; others. There might be more tears, the joyful kind, at this point.

(Yes, we had a serious fondness for Ysaye Barnwell and Sweet Honey in the Rock.)

Then we would feast. (Important aspects of Feast Food in Roses, Too!: chocolate, bread, cheese, fruit, tea or clear water. Variations depended on the season. At Samhain, apples, and birthday cake, always. Challah, often.)

This year, for the first time in many years, I am celebrating Samhain by myself. So after all the trick-or-treaters have gone home (or after we're out of candy), I will take the names I've been writing on pieces of paper and putting into my little cauldron, and the pine needles and dried leaves I've collected, and burn them in our charcoal grill. The names of friends and acquaintances and family who have died this year, or in years past but are still with me; the names of my grandparents and other family members; my beloved and not-so-beloved dead. The endings from this year; the losses that have come through ways other than death, but that cause mourning -- the end of my brother and sister-in-law's marriage; the attrition of volunteer and paid staff colleagues. The losses that cause relief and joy as well, such as the healing of illness or injury. And then I'll welcome the new beginnings and new babies from this year. I haven't entirely decided how yet, but it will involve something sweet, likely chocolate, and a birthday candle.

So, as Samhain approaches, I ask folks who read this:

• Who are you mourning?
• Who are your ancestors, known and unknown?
• What losses are you grieving?
• What babies do you welcome this year?
• What new beginnings are you celebrating?

Who and what would you put into the Cauldron of Cerridwen, into Hecate's Cauldron, the place of death and birth and change and transformation, to recognize this Samhain?

Grief and mourning and loss

Beloved Wife found out Sunday, when delivering a home-cooked meal, that the husband of a faculty member friend is about to start hospice. Not altogether unexpected, but still hard.

I find myself thinking of other friends whose partners have died, remembering being with them before or after. Bearing witness to the grief of losing a partner.

I find myself remembering their spouses, some of whom were also dear friends of mine...

I find those are a number of the names I've put into my cauldron this week, for Samhain.

Stone Circles

This was in my head most of Saturday.

Stone Circles
words & music by Anne Lister
arranged by Connie North for Sound Circle

nobody is an island
there's no way you can cut free
nobody is an island
there's no way you can be cut off by sea

and everything I do
touches you
and everything I am
you hold in your hand

and it seems to me that we are standing stones
there's no way that we can ever be on our own
and even if at times it seems that we are all alone
we're in stone circles marking time
with standing stones

no one is an outsider
there's no way you can cut loose
no one is an outsider
there's always some way to pay your dues

and everything I do
touches you
and everything I am
you hold in your hand

and it seems to me that we are standing stones
there's no way that we can ever be on our own
and even if at times it seems that we are all alone
we're in stone circles marking time
with standing stones

the circle stands forever
there's no angle there to chip or break
the circle stands forever
there's no straight line to show a slight mistake

and everything I do
touches you
and everything I am
you hold in your hand

and it seems to me that we are standing stones
there's no way that we can ever be on our own
and even if at times it seems that we are all alone
we're in stone circles marking time
with standing stones

the wind blows from the hillside
but we stand firm, and we do not bend
the wind blows from the hillside
the circle is a pattern with no end

and everything I do
touches you
and everything I am
you hold in your hand

and it seems to me that we are standing stones
there's no way that we can ever be on our own
and even if at times it seems that we are all alone
we're in stone circles marking time
with standing stones

you musn't break the circle
there's no easy way to be released
you musn't break the circle
and if we stand together, we'll find peace

and everything I do
touches you
and everything I am
you hold in your hand

and it seems to me that we are standing stones
there's no way that we can ever be on our own
and even if at times it seems that we are all alone
we're in stone circles marking time
with standing stones.

Workshop evaluations

I received in the mail from FGC this week the summary of the evaluations for the workshop I facilitated at Gathering this summer.

It seems to me that in the interests of my accountability, I ought to post that summary here.

What I am uncertain about is the comments. There were nine questions that asked for answers in words rather than in check-boxes. Readers who were also participants in the workshop might be able to discern the identity of the writers of two or three of the comments. (And, of course, if you wrote a comment, you may well recognize your own comment/s.)

So, here are my questions:

• Post just the statistical summary?
• Post the comments, but remove any identifiable comments?
• Post both the statistical summary and the comments as they are, since there are no names on anything?

I would appreciate feedback on this one.

Thanks!

Meeting for Worship for Healing and Laughter

I spent a lovely day at Michigan Friends Center today. I went for Richard Lee's workshop, Meeting for Worship for Healing and Laughter. The morning was given over to discussion, the afternoon, to Meeting for Worship for Healing and Laughter itself.

I feel so much more relaxed in my spirit -- all sorts of parts of me are back in expansion instead of contraction. This is a Good Thing.

I am deeply grateful to everyone there.

Samhain approaching

Some years, as Samhain approaches, I don't have time to think about it until it's here, and I find myself breathlessly writing down the names of deaths I want to recognize and births I want to welcome.

Some years, I find myself thinking about death, birth, celebration, and mourning in the weeks leading to Samhain.

This is one of the more-aware-of-loss years. Perhaps because some of the personal work I'm doing is around freeing up my mourning, perhaps because this is a year with a number of significant anniversaries this fall. Probably many things.

Last week, I started collecting dried pine needles for burning at Samhain.

I have a small cast-iron cauldron -- maybe 5 inches in diameter -- which I bought many years ago (at, perhaps predictably, an SCA event, Pennsic). My former partner, Teddy, and I were still together. Both Pennsic, and allowing myself outward expression of my Witchcraft, are intertwined with her memory.

This year, I've found myself wanting to start putting names in a container on my altar -- the cauldron, or perhaps an origami box like the ones my former co-Priestess Laura researched and designed for Coven Samhains.

An interesting experience

My wife and I have been house- and car-sitting for some friends who are away for a few months.

Our car is a 1992 Honda Civic hatchback. I was in an accident this spring -- slightly more than a fender-bender -- and fixing the car completely would take more money than the car is worth. Ordinarily, this wouldn't be an issue -- I am of the "drive it til it's really dead" school -- so we don't usually look at how much a car is worth when we repair it; we look at how much it's worth to us to repair it. And, sadly, it does not make sense to fix this car back up, especially since it still runs okay. If we ever move back to a state with annual inspection, though -- which could easily be next summer, when my wife finishes her PhD -- there's also no point in taking the car with us, because then we'd have to spend $1500-$1800 fixing it; it would be time to sell and replace. (One advantage of living in a state without annual inspection: a market for used "junkers." One advantage of living in a state with annual inspection: it forces you to do decent maintenance on your car.)

But, ever since the accident, I've been pining for a new-to-us car. Our car is old. It was already a little battered; now it's visibly a lot battered. It has no pick-up. The seats are ripped. The paint is fading in places. It doesn't have a cd player (we use a portable with a tape adapter). The a/c, which I wouldn't care about except that I have asthma, works intermittently. My boss' patients, who routinely see it in her parking lot, ask me about it anxiously if they don't see it. Etc.

Worst of all... we have friends with hybrids.

Yes, I have car envy.

So, car-sitting seemed like a good opportunity to both spare our car some wear-and-tear before we sell it this winter or spring and to drive something with more... zing.

The car we're sitting is a Subaru Legacy. Hmmmm.

At first, I thought this car was much more fun to drive. It has pickup. It has a moonroof and a sunroof. It's shinier and newer. The a/c worked great on those rare occasions when I've needed to use it so I could breathe. We could take our own car in for an oil change without transportation gymnastics.

We decided we'd drive the Subaru for a tank of gas, check the mileage, and decide how often to drive it vs the Honda.

I routinely get 40 mpg in my little, old, battered Honda Civic.

We got 20 mpg in the nice, shiny, big, all-wheel drive Subaru Legacy.

The Subaru uses twice as much gas!!

Not only was that way too much money to pay for gas, there was just no way we could justify it environmentally.

So, I went back to driving my little old Honda every day.

Here's the interesting bit.

I thought going back to the Honda would feel like a sacrifice. You know what? It didn't. The Honda's not actually any less fun to drive than the Subaru. So it doesn't accelerate as fast from a dead stop. That is really about it. And swift acceleration burns more fuel. The stereo is nearly as good, and my portable cd player has lots more flexibility. (It plays cd-rw's. It has a shuffle option. Etc.) The Honda is more manouvreable, even though the Subaru has power steering. There's no difference in how much fun shifting is in one vs. the other. And so forth.

And while the Subaru has a bunch of conveniences on the interior, because I can easily reach the back seat floor in the Honda, that also doesn't make that much of a difference.

I thought I'd be cranky about going back to my old car. And I'm not. And that's what I find interesting, and rather nice.

Plus, since I can't get to my job on the bus, it makes me much happier to get 40 mpg.

Fall

Fall has started with, well... fall.

It seemed as if, pretty much literally, the leaves in our neighborhood started turning on Fall Equinox; and some of them started falling shortly thereafter.

looking up our street on our way home from the Farmers' Market last Saturday

The maple across the street from us has some leaves turning that bright, bright red, and has shed a number of them already. In the cemetery across the street, we can see bright tops of trees. One of the trees down the street has already shed most of its leaves, and in the parking lot of my boss' home and office, the oak has started shedding both brown leaves and acorns.


All the pines in our front yard seemed to drop their old needles in the same three days. I swept our porch yesterday, garnering my supply of pine needles to burn at Samhain with my mementos for my beloved dead. I now have an entire paper sack full.


And, of course, everywhere in Ann Arbor, there are that other tree-related marker of fall: black walnuts.

Up through July, our summer was very dry. Then a front stalled out over Michigan, and for two solid weeks we had multiple thunderstorms every day. It's interesting to see what effects the early dryness and then abundance of rain have had on our fall foliage -- colors, and leaf-shedding, especially.

One of the ways my wife and I mark the changing of the seasons is by watching the changing colors on a particular lovely, long, tree-covered hill near where we live. When we're walking/biking/driving home from "downtown," and we come over the Broadway Bridge, this hill stretches out in front of us. In earliest spring, we see the first bits of green appearing on the trees. In deep summer, that hill has every hue of summer tree-green. And it's one of the first places, besides our street, where we start to see the fall colors of the leaves.

I read banned books!

I'm a little late starting, but I definitely wanted to point out that it's Banned Books Week! Click here to read about the American Library Association's "celebration of the freedom to read."

According to the ALA, these were the top ten banned or challenged books of 2006:

• "And Tango Makes Three" by Justin Richardson and Peter Parnell, for homosexuality, anti-family, and unsuited to age group;
  
  
• "Gossip Girls" series by Cecily Von Ziegesar for homosexuality, sexual content, drugs, unsuited to age group, and offensive language;
  
  
• "Alice" series by Phyllis Reynolds Naylor for sexual content and offensive language;
  
  
• "The Earth, My Butt, and Other Big Round Things" by Carolyn Mackler for sexual content, anti-family, offensive language, and unsuited to age group;
  
  
• "The Bluest Eye" by Toni Morrison for sexual content, offensive language, and unsuited to age group;
  
  
• "Scary Stories" series by Alvin Schwartz for occult/Satanism, unsuited to age group, violence, and insensitivity;
  
  
• "Athletic Shorts" by Chris Crutcher for homosexuality and offensive language.
  
  
• "The Perks of Being a Wallflower" by Stephen Chbosky for homosexuality, sexually explicit, offensive language, and unsuited to age group
  
  
• "Beloved" by Toni Morrison for offensive language, sexual content, and unsuited to age group;
  
  
• "The Chocolate War" by Robert Cormier for sexual content, offensive language, and violence.
  

Off the list this year, but on for several years past, are the "Catcher in the Rye" by J.D. Salinger, "Of Mice and Men" by John Steinbeck and "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn" by Mark Twain.

I invite you to celebrate the First Amendment, and your intellectual and political freedom, by reading a banned book this week. :)

Sick kitty doing better

I wrote in late August about one of our cats being quite sick. We've spent the last five weeks managing this. For the first two weeks, it meant force-feeding her four times a day (ie, putting food into her mouth and persuading her to swallow), pilling her twice a day, and giving her subcu fluids every night. After the first week, she started eating some on her own, but we were still pilling her and doing fluids. She was getting bloodwork done every two weeks, and gradually improving, so we progressed to doing fluids every other night, then twice a week.

Kiri had repeat bloodwork on Monday, and I'm very happy to report her liver enzymes are normal. No matter how long or stressful these five weeks have felt to us, it's really an amazingly short turnaround time for hepatic lipidosis. Her vet and we are all quite happy about this.

Hurray!

Best of all, she's supremely perky again. It's disgustingly cute. :)

Friends Hospice Opens!

I received the following email from F/friend TylaAnn Burger, the Director of Friends Hospice of Philadelphia. I've been peripherally involved with Friends Hospice from the beginning, and have been really excited about it from the beginning; if we'd continued to live in Philadelphia, I would have put considerable time and energy into it. They are now going live -- how wonderful! - Stasa

Friends,

It is my privilege to announce that Friends Hospice is fully licensed and ready to open. A considerable number of people have contributed to our reaching this important moment. They have contributed time, energy, prayers, expertise, resources and funds. I want to express my gratitude to everyone who helped bring us to this moment.

Some of our volunteers spent this weekend finishing painting, setting up supply shelves and cleaning the office. Our computer systems are in place and going through final preparations. Our staff is completing their training and we will be ready to accept referrals that have an immediate need for care as of October 1st.

Please continue to keep Friends Hospice in your hearts and prayers as we start care.

TylaAnn Burger,
Executive Director
Friends Hospice
706 W. Girard Avenue
Philadelphia, PA 19123-1313
(215) 925-6848

For more information on Friends Hospice, click here.

Mabon

A good Fall Equinox to you!

Mabon, or Fall Equinox, is the Second Harvest, the Witches' Thanksgiving, the Descent of Inanna, one of the two days of the year when dark and light are in balance, the beginning of the part of the year when each day has more hours of darkness than light...

(More when our internet technical difficulties have been resolved...)

Shana Tova

If you were here, I would feed you apples and honey.

Actually, I would also attempt to feed you kugel.

Every so often, in late September, I get the urge to make kugel. Apple kugel. When I check the calendar, it's invariably in or near the High Holy Days of the Jewish calendar. (Early this year by the Gregorian calendar.)

I am used to my Jewish cultural roots coming out in the Spring, at Pesach. It somewhat takes me by surprise when it happens in the fall, since I didn't grow up celebrating Rosh Hashanah or Yom Kippur.

But, every so often, in late September, I get the urge to make kugel.

As a Witch, this doesn't surprise me too much. Apples are such a fall food, and the early local apples are starting to arrive at the Farmer's Market. Kugel is comfort food, and it's noticeably darker, earlier; the days are getting shorter, more quickly, these days; and over the last few days here in southeastern Michigan, it's also gotten chilly, with lows in the 40s F at night, and highs in the 60s F during the day. And the urge to cook also makes sense to me from both a Pagan and a Jewish perspective.

And so I have been craving kugel.

I've had a music-filled evening while cooking: Broadside Electric, disappear fear, Juliet Spitzer, Hugh Blumenfeld, music from our wedding. There's a an apple-noodle kugel in the oven, with traditionally mishmash ingredients and spices: apples, egg noodles, cottage cheese, dried apricots, sugar, pecans, ginger, cloves, lemon juice, etc.

So I wish you shana tova, a good new year, a sweet new year; and if you were here, I would offer you kugel.

Kiri and Shadow

Here's Kiri, feeling enough better that she wanted to help me on the computer (the computer being one of her favorite things).


Kitties in the sunshine (Shadow, then Kiri):



Someone may still be in guarded condition, but she's clearly feeling better:


:)

Good news from Iowa!

An Iowa court ruled yesterday that same-gender couples in Iowa must be allowed to marry.

• News results, click here.
• News release from Lambda Legal, click here.

FLGBTQC Epistle from MWG '07

An Epistle from Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Concerns
The Summit Conference Center at Haw River State Park
Greensboro, North Carolina
February 18, 2007

To All Friends Everywhere;

Once again, we are called to testify to the love we find moving among us. It is a testimony of radical inclusion. It is a cause of great pain to our corporate body to know that there are some Friends for whom our message is deeply disturbing; indeed, apparently, in contravention of their strongly held beliefs. It would gladden our hearts if Friends could soften their hearts to hear us out.

We met here in Greensboro, North Carolina, in this land rich in Friends’ history, hoping to forge new connections across the spectrum of Quakers practicing a living faith tradition, a tradition with currents in the history of the civil rights movements and the movement for religious freedom. We numbered over 100 adults and a rich and lively mix of “little Friends,” “young Friends” and “young adult Friends” as well. In the midst of winter, we noticed the beginning shoots of the crocus outside our plenary building, a sign of the promise of New Life and continued growth. Friends with histories in programmed, un-programmed, and semi-programmed branches of Quakerism came together to share our faith in continuing revelation and our desire to go beyond our separateness into the fullness of our communion.

After dinner together on Friday evening, we were welcomed by the planning committee of North Carolina Friends who had invited us here to experience the diversity of Friends in this region. After the welcoming, we watched a video titled, “Can We All Be Friends?” a question many of us had on our minds coming to this weekend. Are the differences between Friends so deep we cannot talk with each other, learn from each other? Are we willing to be in communion with each other, open to our differences yet secure in the one Spirit that calls us all to be Friends?

After our opening worship together on Saturday morning, we heard a talk by Max Carter, Director of both Friends Center and Quaker studies at Guilford College. Max spoke of the rich heritage of five different branches of Quakerism in this region. With humor, Max pointed out some of the differences within Friends, today and throughout history. As he talked, many of us began to smile at the differences between us Friends. We marveled at learning a history of Friends that some of us were unaware of (Fighting Quakers and Quaker General Nathaniel Greene!), and began to sense some of what unites us as Friends, but also to acknowledge some of the real differences we have as Friends. We were reminded that to reach real unity of Spirit requires an acknowledgement of our differences before we attempt to seek a Way beyond our differences.

We began each day, as is our practice, with worship. For many of us, our First Day worship was the first time we had experienced the richness of semi-programmed worship, in a worship service led by retired pastor Willie Frye. Willie and his wife Agnes Frye are old friends and allies of Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Concerns. Willie thanked us for being here and reaching out, and called on us to continue to reach out by sharing our light with the world. He pointed out what we all know because we have grown up as different: It is easier to demonize those you do not know. Bigotry requires ignorance and thrives on separateness. The process of coming out, no matter how painful—for ourselves, for our families, for those around us—is an essential witness to the truth of our lives, and our love.

Some of our first messages in worship were about fear, our own fears and the fears others have of us. In his prepared message, “How To Love In A World of Hate,” Willie pointed out that it is so much easier to understand our own fear of others than it is for us to understand their fear of us. He also urged us to seek for the “third way” that Jesus talked about, the way that goes beyond our differences and into an area to which Spirit is calling us all. By getting beyond our differences, we dare to believe that we can bring about a Kingdom of God on earth, where we transcend our differences, not ignoring our disagreements, but finding a way to go through them and beyond our fears. We recognize that this is not easy work, but have faith that this is our work, and it is work that we cannot rightly lay down.

On Saturday night we joined for a Fireside Chat, a panel of Friends from different branches of Quakerism talking of their history and movement through the different kinds of Friends. We were especially moved to hear from a North Carolina Friend who talked of her struggle to reconcile Jesus’ radical love with a history of Friends’ participation in discrimination and oppression. One Friend from Iowa Yearly Meeting (Conservative) talked of her struggles with marriage equality, but more importantly shared with us her personal journey, begun when an Epistle Friends for Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender and Queer Concerns (then called Friends for Lesbian and Gay Concerns) came to her Yearly Meeting. We had wondered those many years ago when we drafted our epistle whether conservative yearly meetings would even read our epistle. It seems our prayers had been answered. A third Friend shared his experiences of discovering he was gay, though married with children, as both he and his wife sought support from their Meeting, as many other divorced Friends had done. A fourth Friend shared her history with evangelical churches and her experience in Oregon where she helped folks get beyond hurtful language so that they could talk with each other. She spoke of living in a world so violent that even our speech is militarized and of trying to overcome that violence by “Opening Hearts and Minds.” She urged us in a talk the next day to “Listen, Affirm, Respond, and Add to the discussion.”

On Sunday night we had another Fireside Chat around the past, present and future of equality struggles. We heard about historical struggles and personal history. Willie and Agnes Frye spoke in moving terms of their deep, painful struggle around their support of FLGBTQC and their gay son. Also, a young adult Friend spoke of the struggle of being faithful to God’s call and the emerging ministry she carries. Their words gave us a glimpse of the power of living Truth and were followed a lesbian Friend who spoke of her struggle to answer her deeply felt call to ministry within North Carolina Yearly Meeting (FUM). This was followed by a presentation by Peterson Toscano, “Queer 101.” With laughter, we were brought back to the importance and the radical idea that being who we are called to be can change the world!

At the end of our brief time together, we have discerned a deep truth: that we have been given a taste of being called to table, a table to which Jesus called all people -- including the despised: prostitutes, tax collectors, fishermen, priests, women and children--people who somehow would find the faith that love is stronger than hatred and would learn that non-violence must be practiced in deed, as well as word.

We go forth from this weekend with the joy of having spent time with many different kinds of Friends. We also carry with us the pain of knowing that other Friends who were invited either could not or would not join us. We acknowledge our own responsibility for some of this, and for the fact that our community does not seem theologically “safe” to some Christians. We continue to struggle as a community with radical inclusiveness and our own continuing-to-be-revealed form of Quakerism. We continue to commit ourselves to not to let our language, our ignorance, or our own unconscious racism separate us from each other and commit ourselves to seek for deeper unity.

We also share with Friends everywhere the irony of this weekend, that our desire to experience One Spirit was first met with exclusion. When we sought for this gathering to use Quaker Lake Camp here in North Carolina, owned by North Carolina Yearly Meeting (FUM), we were denied the use of the camp. We do not respond with rage or anger, but with deep sadness. Who knows how deep our wounding? We acknowledge our sadness that in many respects it feels like 35 years ago when lesbian and gay Friends first came together to show a presence in the Friends community and to say, “We are your brothers, your sisters, your husbands, your wives, your pastors, your sons, your daughters, and your Friends. Let us rejoice in our diversity!” Friends, there is much work yet to be done to bring us all to Jesus’ table.

And we conclude by acknowledging our deep appreciation of the gifts of support by those North Carolina Monthly Meetings who were able to be with us in love and support and who helped to make this gathering so spiritually rich and deep! You have given us your gift of love and we send love in return! Please consider joining us for worship and fellowship when we next gather as a part of Friends General Conference Summer Gathering in River Falls, Wisconsin, June 30 – July 7, 2007.

Joann Neuroth
Recording Clerk

Quaker Pagan anthology

From Jen Chapin-Smith:

Friends- I've talked with Quaker Universalist Fellowship about an idea I've had for nearly a year of putting together an anthology of essays on Quaker Paganism. QUF is interested in discussing publishing such as book (it would be similar to the nontheist Friends' "Godless for God's Sake") but want a preliminary table of contents. If you are interested in contributing a chapter of any length, please let me know a preliminary title/subject. I'm working on one about how I define Quaker Paganism and how I see it fitting into the larger Society of Friends and Quaker history.

Please then send the essay as soon as you can. As editor, I reserve the right to actually edit all submissions.

If you're interested, you can contact Jen at jench1977 at hotmail dot com.

For more information on Godless for God's Sake: Nontheism in Contemporary Quakerism, click here.