Epistle from the 6th World Conference of Friends

This moved me.  - sm

from http://saltandlight2012.org/6th-world-conference-friends-epistle.

24 April 2012

To Friends Everywhere,

We greet you amid the beauty of the Rift Valley, surrounded by the welcoming embrace of Kenyan Friends.  From April 17 to 25, 2012 close to 850 men and women from all the streams of Friends, coming from 112 yearly meetings and groups in 51 countries have gathered at Kabarak University near Nakuru to consider the theme "Being Salt and Light: Friends Living the Kingdom of God in a Broken World."

The colours, songs, movements, rich diversity and joyful spirit of Friends here gathered have inspired and uplifted us all.  We have heard Friends from around the world, including several young, prophetic voices, speak on the theme. They gave a wide variety of interpretations of salt and light in a biblical context and also in how we can apply its meaning to life in our world today.

The call that brought us together was to be salt and light as we live out the Kingdom of God.  We received this call with a real sense of urgency in these times of natural disasters, violence, global change, and unequal access to basic needs.  We have been reminded that we are sometimes too preoccupied with being heavenly to be useful on Earth. We see this as a challenge to not detach ourselves from the wider society in hope that this will bring us closer to God. Rather, we need to be present and engaged in our communities, while remaining attentive to the Still, Small Voice, in order to allow the Spirit to work through us.

'The Religious Society of Friends--the Friends Church-- is about nothing if it is not about transformation' in the words of one of our speakers.  As Friends we feel called to try to return to the conviction and simple faith of our Quaker ancestors and their transformed lives, so that we may once again become a prophetic people, speaking to God's purposes in these times.

We first have to look inward, both as individuals and as a religious society.  Can we end our internal strife? Can we reach out in love to one another as Jesus commanded? We may not understand liberal/evangelical/programmed/unprogrammed Friends but we are Friends. The diversity of Friends at this conference has provided us with an opportunity to live out our testimonies to equality and truth. Our ability to do so has been put to the test. We found ourselves reluctant to go beyond polite acceptance and avoidance of difference. We are not united in all of our attitudes and beliefs, yet we choose to come together to listen, to share, and to hear things we may find uncomfortable and upsetting. As we choose to seek connection in the midst of our differences, we witness the power of God to bless and heal. We may not always understand each other fully, but we are united in our yearning for transformation. We are united in God.

We live in a broken world. We were moved to realise that so many of us here carry a sense of grief, loss, failure or hurt. We were forced to recognise the brokenness in us and in our Religious Society. A speaker challenged us to consider that brokenness may also be opportunity. We are uncomfortable with feeling brokenness and seeing it around us, yet from it we gain strength, empathy and compassion. Rather than trying to heal our brokenness as quickly as possible, we challenge ourselves - and Friends everywhere - to consider what God's plan could be for a hurting individual, and for a hurting community.

We know that the Kingdom is come and coming. We pray that we may experience the Kingdom of God within ourselves here and now, so that we may live it more fully in transforming this world. In this we anticipate the everlasting Kingdom, in which the world will be made whole.

Here in Kenya, we remember the post-election violence that shook this nation in 2008, and the courageous stance taken by our brothers and sisters. We invite all Friends to join us in prayer for Kenyan Friends who are working even now for the prevention of conflict, and for their whole nation as their elections approach. We pray also for all people facing conflict and violence in the world.

Early on in our time together, we were asked the same question that God asked Elijah on Sinai: "What are you doing here?" In the latter half of the conference we have considered many queries that have come out of our work together in small groups. Each of these queries asks, in one way or another, "What will you do after you leave here?" We bear these queries with us, as they are for all Friends to discern how God is leading.

The inward voice of Christ Jesus is what will answer these questions for us. May we be faithful in listening to that voice once we have returned from this gathering.  As Christ leads all of us, we can become the salt of the Earth and the light of our broken world.
 

Yom HaShoah

[Visual content warning, near the end, for concentration camp survivors.]

International Holocaust Remembrance Day, instituted by the United Nations General Assembly, is on the 27th of January (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/International_Holocaust_Remembrance_Day).

Today is Yom HaShoah, Holocaust Remembrance Day, in the Jewish calendar.

But I remind you, my friends, that the Holocaust killed not only Jews. That of the 11 million people killed in the Nazi concentration camps, 6 million were Jews, and 5 million were:

• political prisoners
• leftists
• liberals
• communists
• pacifists
• conscription resisters
• deserters
• spies
• prisoners of war
• unionists
• royalists
• social democrats
• socialists
• Freemasons
• anarchists
• convicts
• forced laborers
• immigrants
• gay and bisexual men
• lesbian and bisexual women
• people of color
• Jehovah's witnesses
• Roma (gypsies)
• people with mental illness
• people with disabilities
• alcoholics and addicts
• beggars
• homeless people
• sex workers
• "race defilers" (people who had sex with the "wrong" opposite-sex people)
• those who couldn't work
• racial, ethnic, religious, and cultural minorities
• and more.

You and me.

Never again. Never forget.

I was privileged to know a number of Holocaust survivors growing up.

I honor them, those who are still living and the memory of those who have died.

------------

The Nazis used at least twelve distinct symbols in concentration camps.  Here are two posters depicting them:

Photos of Nazi concentration camp charts of prisoner markings public domain; source, Wikimedia; second photo by US Holocaust Memorial Museum.

For more information, I encourage you to see the Wikipedia entries on:

Nazi concentration camp badges at
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nazi_concentration_camp_badges and

Holocaust victims at
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holocaust_victims.   

Stalking in real life and on-line: National Stalking Awareness Day

Wednesday, April 18th is National Stalking Awareness Day in Scotland, Wales, and England (http://www.scotlandagainststalking.com/node/67). 

I want to talk a little bit about what stalking is, and a little in particular about cyber-stalking/virtual stalking, and why it carries real-world dangers. 

What is stalking?  

According to Action Scotland Against Stalking (ASAS), stalking includes "unwanted intrusions and communications," "following, loitering nearby, maintaining surveillance, and sending unwanted gifts or messages" (http://www.scotlandagainststalking.com/node/64).

It's very, very easy to pretend that this sort of behavior is irritating and upsetting, but not really dangerous.

However, over and over, law enforcement, advocates, and victims have seen that this behavior escalates over time, and too often culminates in assault (physical and/or sexual) or murder (ibid).

Stalking is dangerous.  

The key point is attention that is unwanted, unwelcome, intrusive, repeated, persistent, causing anxiety, causing fear or anger.

It does not matter if the stalker is male or female.  It does not matter if they're a complete stranger, someone you know vaguely, someone you know well, a co-worker or former co-worker, a former family member, or someone you were once very close to but ended a relationship or friendship with. 

If someone is stalking you, or you think someone might be stalking you but you're not sure, both ASAS and the National Stalking Helpine have on-line resources to help you assess the situation as well as to take steps to increase your safety.

• "What Should I Do?," http://www.scotlandagainststalking.com/node/65, and 
• "About Stalking," http://www.stalkinghelpline.org/faq/about-stalking/.  

Again, they repeat that even if the situation has not become violent, it still causes harm and decreases the victim's quality of life. 

If someone is stalking you, it's all too easy too feel isolated and ashamed.

It's important to remember that it is not your fault. 

Cyber-stalking

Cyber-stalking may take place anywhere in the on-line world: email, websites, social networking, mobile phones, texts, etc.  Hand-in-hand with this is digitally-assisted stalking, with yet other tech aspects such as GPS.

According to the National Stalking Helpline (http://www.stalkinghelpline.org/faq/about-stalking/) and Action Scotland Against Stalking (http://www.scotlandagainststalking.com/cyberstalking), cyber-stalking, although it takes place on-line, is much like "traditional" stalking and is essentially an extension of it.

Why is cyber-stalking dangerous if it takes place virtually?

Cyber-stalking, just like "traditional" stalking, escalates -- and just like with "traditional" stalking, it can escalate into physical violence, including death.

Unwanted attention on-line can be even harder to take seriously than unwanted attention in the "real," physical world -- but it can be just as dangerous.

Also, it's not hard for a cyber-stalker to figure out where the person they're stalking is in real life if that person adds specific locations to their blog posts; if they check in on social networking apps and have their privacy set so anyone can see where they are; or if the cyber-stalker is making a point of friending on social networks as many of the victim's friends as possible, etc. 

Both NSH and ASAS offer cyber-safety tips at their websites.

Cyber-stalking and women on-line

Part of why I'm bringing this up is because many women in particular are targets of cyber-stalking -- especially women bloggers -- because we are women.

As Kate Harding points out:

Being viciously, persistently attacked for the crime of Writing While Female is something practically everyone with an opinion on the matter regards as par for the course–regardless of whether they believe that fact is outrageous and deplorable or merely, you know, the way the cookie crumbles.

(http://kateharding.net/2007/04/14/on-being-a-no-name-blogger-using-her-real-name/)

It's bad enough being attacked on-line for no other reason than being female.  But there is ample evidence these attacks then spill over into real life.  For some high-profile examples, witness what has happened to Kathy Sierra and Rebecca Watson both on-line and in real life.  (Rather than going into details here, I suggest you search for "Kathy Sierra Geek Feminism" and/or "Rebecca Watson Privilege Delusion" for more information.) 

Less high-profile incidents happen to the rest of us when we're stalked in cyber-space and in real life.  Every day.   

How do I know how seriously to take this?  or, Okay, I'm taking this seriously, but how do I talk to other people about it?  

If you're having a hard time figuring out how seriously to take someone's persistent unwanted attention, or if you're taking it seriously but having a hard time talking to other people about it or getting other people to take it seriously, here are two helpful risk-identification tools by Laura Richards (http://laurarichards.co.uk/):

• The Stalking-DASH Risk Identification Checklist (S-DASH 2009), by Lorraine Sheridan, Karl Roberts and Laura Richards, http://www.dashriskchecklist.co.uk/index.php?page=s-dash-for-use-in-stalking-cases-by-practitioners.
• The VS-DASH Risk Identification Checklist (VS-DASH 2009), an adaptation for victims to use, by Lorraine Sheridan, Karl Roberts and Laura Richards, http://www.dashriskchecklist.co.uk/index.php?page=vs-dash-for-use-in-stalking-cases-by-victims. 

I have found both very useful in assessing my own situation.

No, you're not alone

If you're being stalked, if someone is stalking you, you're not alone.  And it's very important to reach out to other people and get both support and help.  This can be very hard -- I know.  But as with any other kind of violence against women, it's that much more important for women who are being stalked to reach through the isolation.  The first person you reach out to might not be able to help you or be inclined to take you seriously.  The second person might not.  But you're still not alone, and it's still important to keep asking for help until you do get it.

Resources in the US

Since all the resources I've cited so far have been in the UK, here are some that are specific to the US:

• The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence State Coalition List.  State Coalitions have lists of local organizations which can help you assess and deal with your situation.  http://www.ncadv.org/resources/StateCoalitionList.php
• The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence links list.  A list of resources throughout the US.  http://www.ncadv.org/resources/ExternalLinks.php
• The US Department of Justice web page on stalking: http://www.ovw.usdoj.gov/aboutstalking.htm
• The National Center for Victims of Crime, Stalking Resource Center: http://www.ncvc.org/src/Main.aspx

A question about "Pagan" Quaker process

There's been some interesting discussion recently on the QuakerPagans email discussion list -- along the lines of, since early Friends came to/developed Quaker worship through Christian scripture (and through specific passages in Christian scripture), do Pagan Friends approach Meeting for Worship, and Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, in an essentially different way?  If so, how?  (And how would one explain any difference, or lack of difference, to Christian Friends?)

What I'm sharing here is expanded from an email I wrote to that list, so it's a little bit taken out of context, and sort of me thinking out loud; but I wanted to share it anyway.

Like many modern-day Friends, I came to Friends through experience, rather than through reading Hebrew or Christian scriptures (although I was well-read in both, long before I came to Quakerism).  My participation in Meeting for Worship, and Meeting for Worship with Attention to Business, is rooted most in my direct experience of That-Which-Is-Sacred, and less in written words -- in experience, not in theory, and not in anyone else's recording of their experience (although I very much appreciate attempts to put experience into words). 

I started coming to Meeting for Worship because I had a leading to come.  It's true that I initially thought that at worst, I'd get an hour of communal meditation out of it, but notice, even at the beginning, I knew that would be "at worst." 

It's not Hebrew or Christian scriptures ("the Bible") that speaks to Christian Friends in worship -- it's the Divine Presence. 

Why would I, as a Pagan Friend, not expect That-Which-Is-Sacred to speak to me/us directly in Meeting for Worship, whether "regular" worship or worship for business -- ? 

I don't pretend to have all the theaological answers about which Gods/Divine Spirits are moving through us and speaking to us in worship.  In general, it doesn't much bother me if we're experiencing different Gods, unless people start getting monotheist exclusivist about it (or, try to tell me they're all the same God).  I can accept that there is some unifying spark, some unifying something which I don't fully understand; and that also works for me as a non-theist as well as a Pagan.

To me, the bottom line is that Quakerism is bigger than Christianity.  Quaker practice is bigger than Jesus and Yhwh.  It's not limited to the God/s of Christianity.  Quaker practice can be informed by Jesus, Yhwh, Brigid, Herne, Cernunnos, Morgan, Athena, Demeter, Hecate, Cerridwen, Maiden, Mother, Crone, Air, Fire, Water, Earth, Spirit, many others, no god at all.

That's how powerful it is. 

And that's how Friends of differing theaologies can worship, and do Quaker business, together, in love and trust, asking how we're led. 

At least, that's been my experience. 

Of Quaker worship, and Quaker process, at its best, most powerful, most amazing, most magical, and most transformative.